Mrs. Raffles: Being the Adventures of an Amateur CrackswomanBangs, John Kendrick
General
Mrs. Raffles: Being the Adventures of an Amateur Crackswoman
Bangs, John Kendrick
Hornung, E. W. (Ernest William), 1866-1921 -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Jewel thieves -- Fiction
"It's fine, Bunny," she cried, with an enthusiastic laugh as she gazed
out over the broad acres of Raffleshurst and noted how well I had
fulfilled her orders. "Under proper direction you are a most able
workman. Nothing could be better. Nothing--absolutely nothing. And now
for Mr. Carnegie."
I still did not see how the thing was coming out, but such was my
confidence in my leader that I had no misgivings.
"Here is a letter from Mrs. Gaster introducing the Hon. Henry
Higginbotham, mayor of Raffleshurst, to Mr. Carnegie," said Henriette.
"You will call at once on the iron-master. Present this letter,
keeping in mind of course that you are yourself the Hon. Henry
Higginbotham. Show him these photographs of the City Hall at
Binghamton, of the public park at Oberlin, the high school at Oswego,
the battery walk at Charleston and other public improvements of
various other cities, when he asks you what sort of a place
Raffleshurst is; then frankly and fearlessly put in your application
for a one-hundred-and-fifty-thousand-dollar library. One picture--this
beautiful photograph of the music-hall at the St. Louis Exhibition--you
must seem to overlook always, only contrive matters so that he will
inquire what it is. You must then modestly remark that it is nothing but
a little two-hundred-thousand-dollar art gallery you have yourself
presented to the town. See?"
"H'm--yes, I see," said I. "But it is pretty risky business, Henriette.
Suppose Mrs. Gaster asks for further information about Mayor
Higginbotham? I think it was unwise of you to connect her with the
enterprise."
"Don't bother about that, Bunny. _I_ wrote that letter of
introduction--I haven't studied penmanship for nothing, you know.
Mrs. Gaster will never know. So just put on your boldest front,
remember your name, and don't forget to be modest about your own
two-hundred-thousand-dollar art gallery. That will inspire him, I
think."
It took me a week to get at the iron-master; but finally, thanks to
Mrs. Gaster's letter of introduction, I succeeded. Mr. Carnegie was as
always in a most amiable frame of mind, and received me cordially, even
when he discovered my real business with him.
[Illustration: "'IF YOU WANTED A LAKE, MR. HIGGINBOTHAM, I--'"]
"I hadn't intended to give any more libraries this year," he said, as he
glanced over the pictures. "I am giving away lakes now," he added. "If
you wanted a lake, Mr. Higginbotham, I--"
"We have such a large water-front already, Mr. Carnegie," said I, "and
most of our residents are young married couples with children not over
three and five. I am afraid they would regard a lake as a source of
danger."
"That's a pretty playground," he suggested, glancing at the Oberlin
Park. "Somehow or other, it reminds me of something."
I thought it quite likely, but, of course, I didn't say so. I may be a
fool but I have some tact.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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