My Double Life: The Memoirs of Sarah BernhardtBernhardt, Sarah
General
My Double Life: The Memoirs of Sarah Bernhardt
Bernhardt, Sarah
Actors -- France -- Biography; Bernhardt, Sarah, 1844-1923
The younger men were stooping over Régina, washing her pretty face, and
the child was saying in her broken voice, “I did not do it on purpose,
sister, I am certain I didn’t. She’s an old cow, and she just kicked for
nothing at all!” Régina was a fair-haired seraph, who might have made
the angels envious, for she had the most ideal and poetical beauty—but
her language was by no means choice, and nothing in the world could
change it. Her coarse speech made the friendly group burst out laughing,
while all the members of the enemy’s camp shrugged their shoulders.
Bressant, who was the most charming of the comedians and a general
favourite, came up to me and said:
“We must arrange this little matter, dear Mademoiselle, for Nathalie’s
short arms are really very long. Between ourselves, you were a trifle
hasty, but I like that, and then that child is so droll and so pretty,”
he added, pointing to my little sister.
The house was stamping with impatience, for this little scene had caused
twenty minutes’ delay, and we were obliged to go on to the stage at
once. Marie Roger kissed me, saying, “You are a plucky little comrade!”
Rose Baretta drew me to her, murmuring, “How dared you do it! She is a
Sociétaire!”
As for me, I was not very conscious as to what I had done, but my
instinct warned me that I should pay dearly for it.
The following day I received a letter from the manager asking me to call
at the Comédie at one o’clock, about a matter concerning me privately. I
had been crying all night long, more through nervous excitement than
from remorse, and I was particularly annoyed at the idea of the attacks
I should have to endure from my own family. I did not let my mother see
the letter, for from the day that I had entered the Comédie I had been
emancipated. I received my letters now direct, without her supervision,
and I went about alone.
At one o’clock precisely I was shown into the manager’s office. M.
Thierry, his nose more congested than ever, and his eyes more crafty,
preached me a deadly sermon, blamed my want of discipline, absence of
respect, and scandalous conduct, and finished his pitiful harangue by
advising me to beg Madame Nathalie’s pardon.
“I have asked her to come,” he added, “and you must apologise to her
before three Sociétaires, members of the committee. If she consents to
forgive you, the committee will then consider whether to fine you or to
cancel your engagement.”
I did not reply for a few minutes. I thought of my mother in distress,
my godfather laughing in his _bourgeois_ way, and my Aunt Faure
triumphant, with her usual phrase, “That child is terrible!” I thought
too of my beloved Brabender, with her hands clasped, her moustache
drooping sadly, her small eyes full of tears, so touching in their mute
supplication. I could hear my gentle, timid Madame Guérard arguing with
every one, so courageous was she always in her confidence in my future.
“Well, Mademoiselle?” said M. Thierry curtly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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