On Christmas Eve Regina went early to bed, complaining of an
indisposition which made Signora Anna thoughtful, but was not
suggestive to Antonio. He knew, or thought he knew, the subtle malady
which was consuming his wife. He knew its name: Nostalgia; and he
left to time the responsibility of its cure.
Regina was no sooner in bed than she began to remember and to
meditate. Christmas in Rome! She saw over again the carts of live
fowls being drawn through the streets; the ladies passing quickly
along with parcels in their hands; the fat pork-butchers looking out
from their nauseating shops with the importance of Roman emperors;
his Excellency an Under-Secretary of State standing in front of
Dagnino's window with a visage of terrible perplexity.
She reflected upon the quarrel which had broken out among Signora
Anna, Gaspare and the maid about wax candles. Marina had gone up and
down the stair at least twenty times, each time coming back with
parcels, but each time forgetting something. During the whole of
lunch and the whole of dinner the brothers, their mother and the girl
had discussed the supplies of food.
Well! it had all produced in Regina a sort of spiritual indigestion.
Alone in the great bed, shivering, crumpled up, she was conscious of
an unspeakable depression. She felt like a little snail which hears
the rain pattering on its shell. And she thought continually of the
distant hearth, the grey night illumined by the snow. Behind the
voices and the laughter which vibrated from the dining-room, behind
the painful screech of the trams, behind the buzz of the merry-making
city, she heard the whistling of trains in the station. Some of the
whistles laughed, some wept; one, faint and tender, seemed the voice
of a questioning child; one was like a zigzag on a black sky; one
mocked at Regina. "Are you ready to go? Not you! not you! It's your
own fault. Here you've come, and here you stay! Good-bye! Good-bye!"
She worked herself into a passion. She was angry even with his
Excellency, who had looked in at Dagnino's window, fixing his gold
eye-glasses. She asked, exasperated, who were all those strange
people laughing and joking in the dining-room?
Antonio soon joined her. She pretended to sleep. He was solicitous
and touched her gently. Feeling her very cold, he drew nearer to warm
her. She was moved, but did not open her eyes.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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