Not George Washington — an Autobiographical NovelWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Not George Washington — an Autobiographical Novel
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
“I proposed to your cousin at the Gunton-Cresswells’s dance tonight,
and she accepted me.”
The news had a surprising effect on Julian. First he blinked. Then he
craned his head forward in the manner of a deaf man listening with
difficulty.
Then he left the room without a word.
He had not been gone two minutes when there were three short, sharp
taps at my window.
Julian returned? Impossible. Yet who else could have called on me at
that hour?
I went to the front door, and opened it.
On the steps stood the Rev. John Hatton. Beside him Sidney Price. And,
lurking in the background, Tom Blake of the _Ashlade_ and _Lechton_.
_(End of James Orlebar Cloister’s narrative.)_
Sidney Price’s Narrative
CHAPTER 17
A GHOSTLY GATHERING
Norah Perkins is a peach, and I don’t care who knows it; but, all the
same, there’s no need to tell her every little detail of a man’s past
life. Not that I’ve been a Don What’s-his-name. Far from it. Costs a
bit too much, that game. You simply can’t do it on sixty quid a year,
paid monthly, and that’s all there is about it. Not but what I don’t
often think of going it a bit when things are slack at the office and
my pal in the New Business Department is out for lunch. It’s the
loneliness makes you think of going a regular plunger. More than once,
when Tommy Milner hasn’t been there to talk to, I tell you I’ve half a
mind to take out some girl or other to tea at the “Cabin.” I have,
straight.
Yet somehow when the assist. cash. comes round with the wicker tray on
the 1st, and gives you the envelope (“Mr. Price”) and you take out the
five sovereigns—well, somehow, there’s such a lot of other things which
you don’t want to buy but have just got to. Tommy Milner said the other
day, and I quite agree with him, “When I took my clean handkerchief out
last fortnight,” he said, “I couldn’t help totting up what a lot I
spend on trifles.” That’s it. There you’ve got it in a nutshell.
Washing, bootlaces, bus-tickets—trifles, in fact: that’s where the coin
goes. Only the other morning I bust my braces. I was late already, and
pinning them together all but lost me the 9:16, only it was a bit
behind time. It struck me then as I ran to the station that the average
person would never count braces an expense. Trifles—that’s what it is.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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