Odd craft [complete]Jacobs, W. W. (William Wymark)
General
Odd craft [complete]
Jacobs, W. W. (William Wymark)
England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English; Sailors -- Fiction
Mr. Gunnill eyed her in dismay. In his confusion he had overestimated
the capacity of his mouth, and he now strove in vain to reply to this
shameful perversion of his meaning. His daughter stood watching him
with grief in one eye and calculation in the other, and, just as he had
put himself into a position to exercise his rights of free speech, gave
a pathetic sniff and walked out of the room.
She stayed indoors all day, but the necessity of establishing his
innocence took Mr. Gunnill out a great deal. His neighbours, in the
hope of further excitement, warmly pressed him to go to prison rather
than pay a fine, and instanced the example of an officer in the
Salvation Army, who, in very different circumstances, had elected to
take that course. Mr. Gunnill assured them that only his known
antipathy to the army, and the fear of being regarded as one of its
followers, prevented him from doing so. He paid instead a fine of ten
shillings, and after listening to a sermon, in which his silver hairs
served as the text, was permitted to depart. His feeling against
Police-constable Cooper increased with the passing of the days. The
constable watched him with the air of a proprietor, and Mrs. Cooper’s
remark that “her husband had had his eye upon him for a long time, and
that he had better be careful for the future,” was faithfully retailed
to him within half an hour of its utterance. Convivial friends counted
his cups for him; teetotal friends more than hinted that Cooper was in
the employ of his good angel.
[Illustration]
Miss Gunnill’s two principal admirers had an arduous task to perform.
They had to attribute Mr. Gunnill’s disaster to the vindictiveness of
Cooper, and at the same time to agree with his daughter that it served
him right. Between father and daughter they had a difficult time, Mr.
Gunnill’s sensitiveness having been much heightened by his troubles.
“Cooper ought not to have taken you,” said Herbert Sims for the
fiftieth time.
“He must ha’ seen you like it dozens o’ times before,” said Ted Drill,
who, in his determination not to be outdone by Mr. Sims, was not
displaying his usual judgment. “Why didn’t he take you then? That’s
what you ought to have asked the magistrate.”
“I don’t understand you,” said Mr. Gunnill, with an air of cold
dignity.
“Why,” said Mr. Drill, “what I mean is—look at that night, for
instance, when——”
He broke off suddenly, even his enthusiasm not being proof against the
extraordinary contortions of visage in which Mr. Gunnill was indulging.
“When?” prompted Selina and Mr. Sims together. Mr. Gunnill, after first
daring him with his eye, followed suit.
“That night at the Crown,” said Mr. Drill, awkwardly. “You know; when
you thought that Joe Baggs was the landlord. You tell ’em; you tell it
best. I’ve roared over it.”
“I don’t know what you’re driving at,” said the harassed Mr. Gunnill,
bitterly.
“_H’m!_” said Mr. Drill, with a weak laugh. “I’ve been mixing you up
with somebody else.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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