Kentucky -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories, American
Uncle Zach, with large authority, had given the opening order, and at
the side tables a pleasing clatter of china had arisen, when Squire
Futrell put down his glass and rose, with a startled look on his face.
“Looky here, boys!” he exclaimed. “This won't never do! Did you fellers
know there wus thirteen at the table?”
Sure enough, there were!
It has been claimed--perhaps not without colour of plausibility--that
Southerners are more superstitious than Northerners. Assuredly the
Southerners of a generation that is almost gone now uniformly nursed
their private beliefs in charms, omens, spells, hoodoos and portents. As
babies many of them were nursed, as boys all of them were played with,
by members of the most superstitious race--next to actors--on the face
of creation. An actor of Ethiopian descent should by rights be the
most superstitious creature that breathes the air of this planet, and
doubtlessly is.
No one laughed at Squire Futrell's alarm over his discovery. Possibly
excusing Father Minor, it is probable that all present shared it with
him. As for Uncle Zach Mathews and his two assistants, they froze with
horror where they had halted, their loaded trays poised on their arms.
But they did not freeze absolutely solid--they quivered slightly.
“Law-zee!” gasped Uncle Zach, with his eyeballs rolling. “Dinner can't
go no fur'der twell we gits somebody else in or meks somebody leave and
go 'way--dat's sartain shore! Whee! We kin all thank Our Maker dat dey
ain't been nary bite et yit.”
“Amen to dat, Brer Zach!” muttered Ike shakily; and dumbly Tobe Emery
nodded, stricken beyond power of speech by the nearness of a barely
averted catastrophe fraught with disaster, if not with death itself.
Involuntarily Judge Priest had shoved his chair back; most of the others
had done the same thing. He got on his feet with alacrity.
“Boys,” he said, “the squire is right--there's thirteen of us. Now whut
d'ye reckin we're goin' to do 'bout that?”
The natural suggestion would be that they send at once for another
person. Three or four offered it together, their voices rising in a
babble. Names of individuals who would make congenial table mates
were heard. Among others, Sergeant Jimmy Bagby was spoken of; likewise
Colonel Cope and Captain Woodward. But Judge Priest shook his head.
“I can't agree with you-all,” he set forth. “By the time we sent clean
uptown and rousted one of them boys out, the vittles would all be cold.”
“Well, Billy,” demanded Doctor Lake, “what are you going to do, then? We
can't go ahead this way, can we? Of course I don't believe in all this
foolishness about signs myself; but”--he added--“but I must admit to a
little personal prejudice against thirteen at the table.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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