After the war Billy, old and dispirited, drifted to a small town in Maryland. His independence, quaint humor (narrations and mirations) soon attached the townspeople to him, who kept him in tobacco, clothed and made him comfortable. Billy never tired of expatiating upon his old home, haunts, ole Miss and ole Mars. It was his nature to exaggerate, and he told about the fo’-in-hands he drove (he never drove) until it got to be a joke; and they would tease him and say they had heard he only drove mules and steers, which made him furious, and he would brandish his cane at his accusers. When Mr. Cleveland was first elected President Billy was very much disturbed. He thought all the negroes would be sold into slavery, and his loquaciousness and solicitude suggested the following joke, which was played upon him to the amusement of the township: At several places in the town, to which Billy’s attention was called, printed notices were tacked up that on a certain day all negroes in Maryland would be sold to the highest bidder. When Billy saw it, he swore lustily, and on the day of sale he was made to stand on a goodsbox, and cried to the highest bidder. It was a very funny sight. Billy said: “Ef’n ole Mars, er Miss Henrietta wuz erlive dey’d kill ebery lars’ one ub you.” The spectators walked around him, looked in his mouth feigning to tell his age, and praised his noble appearance. Billy looked scornfully at the laboring people, some of whom had been instructed to bid on him, and graciously at the gentry present. A pretended buyer asked if he belonged to the church. Billy said: “I don’ ’long ter no chuch, an’ I ain’ gwine ter jine, an’ gib up meh fiddle an’ banjo.” Just then some one looked him over and said: “Splendid, honest face! I will give $5,000 for him.” Billy said, with great pomposity: “I al’ays knewed uh quality niggah, an’ I’s glad ter be uh slabe, ef’n uh gemman buy me. I tole de niggahs ef’n dey wote de Dimcrat ticket dey’d all be sol’ ergin, but dey sech ornry fools.” Finally a man said $5,000 was nothing for him; he would give $10,000. Whereupon a carpenter nailing shingles on a roof within earshot of the sale, knowing Billy’s weakness for talking about his ole master’s horses, and thinking to draw him out and please him, asked: “Can Billy drive a carriage?” Whereupon Billy broke up the sale by saying: “What in de h—l you wan’ ter know fuh? You nebba own uh kerridge.” SERMON.[7]