Our Deportment: Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society — John Shaqi
Our Deportment: Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined SocietyYoung, John H.
General
Our Deportment: Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society
Young, John H.
Etiquette
It is to be remembered that an introduction is regarded as a social
endorsement of the person introduced, and that, under certain
circumstances, it would be wrong to introduce to our friends casual
acquaintances, of whom we know nothing, and who may afterwards prove to
be anything but desirable persons to know. Care should be taken,
therefore, in introducing two individuals, that the introduction be
mutually agreeable. Whenever it is practicable, it is best to settle the
point by inquiring beforehand. When this is inexpedient from any cause,
a thorough acquaintance with both parties will warrant the introducer to
judge of the point for him or herself.
UNIVERSAL INTRODUCTIONS.
While the habit of universal introductions is a bad one, there are many
men in cities and villages who are not at all particular whom they
introduce to each other. As a general rule, a man should be as careful
about the character of the person he introduces to his friends, as he is
of him whose notes he would endorse.
THE INTRODUCTION OF A GENTLEMAN TO A LADY.
A gentleman should not be introduced to a lady, unless her permission
has been previously obtained, and no one should ever be introduced into
the house of a friend, except permission is first granted. Such
introductions, however, are frequent, but they are improper, for a
person cannot know that an introduction of this kind will be agreeable.
If a person asks you to introduce him to another, or a gentleman asks to
be introduced to a lady, and you find the introduction would not be
agreeable to the other party, you may decline on the grounds that you
are not sufficiently intimate to take that liberty.
When a gentleman is introduced to a lady, both bow slightly, and the
gentleman opens conversation. It is the place of the one who is
introduced to make the first remark.
INFORMAL INTRODUCTION.
It is not strictly necessary that acquaintanceship should wait a formal
introduction. Persons meeting at the house of a common friend may
consider that fact a sufficient warrant for the preliminaries of
acquaintanceship, if there appears to be a mutual inclination toward
such acquaintanceship. The presence of a person in a friend's house is a
sufficient guaranty for his or her respectability. Gentlemen and ladies
may form acquaintances in traveling, on a steamboat, in a railway car,
or a stage-coach, without the formality of an introduction. Such
acquaintanceship should be conducted with a certain amount of reserve,
and need not be prolonged beyond the time of casual meeting. The
slightest approach to disrespect or familiarity should be checked by
dignified silence. A young lady, however, is not accorded the same
privilege of forming acquaintances as is a married or elderly lady, and
should be careful about doing so.
INTRODUCTIONS AT A BALL.
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