Parents and childrenMason, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Maria)
Philosophy
Parents and children
Mason, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Maria)
Child rearing; Education -- Parent participation
IV. _Lies inspired by selfishness._ This is a form of lying for which
superficial treatment is quite idle. The lie and the vice of which it
is the instrument are so allied that those two cannot be put asunder.
Professor Stanley Hall well points out that school is a fertile field
for this kind of lying. But it is the selfishness and not the lying
that must be dealt with. Cure the first, and the second disappears,
having no further _raison d’être_. How? This is a hard question.
Nothing but a strong impulse to the heroism of unselfishness,
initiated and sustained by the grace of God, will deliver boy or girl
from the vice of selfishness of which lying is the ready handmaid. But
let us not despair; _every_ boy and girl is open to such impulse, is
capable of heroic effort. Prayer and patience, and watchfulness for
opportunities to convey the stimulating suggestion--these will not be
in vain. _Every_ boy and girl is a hero _in posse_. There is no worse
infidelity than that which gives up the hope of mending any flaw of
character, however bad, in a young creature. All the same, happy those
parents who have not allowed selfishness and virtue (whether in the
form of truthfulness, or under some other name), to come to hand to
hand conflict. It is easy to give direction to the tendencies of a
child; it is agonisingly difficult to alter the set of character in a
man.
V. _The Deception of imagination and play._ I passed little Muriel in
the park one day; the child was not looking; her companion was unknown
to me. I was engaged with my companion, and believed that Muriel had
not noticed me. The little girl went home and told her mother that I
had kissed her and asked various questions about the family health.
What could be the child’s motive? She had none. Her active imagination
rehearsed the little dialogue which most naturally would have taken
place; and this was so real to her that it obscured the fact. The
reality, the truth, to Muriel, was what she imagined had taken place.
She had probably no recollection whatever of the actual facts. This
sort of failure in verbal truthfulness is excessively common in
imaginative children, and calls for prompt attention and treatment;
but not on the lines a hasty and righteous parent might be inclined
to adopt. Here is no call for moral indignation. The parents and not
the child are in fault. The probability is that the child’s ravenous
imagination is not duly and daily supplied with its proper meat, of
fairy tale in early days, of romance, later. Let us believe of the
children that “trailing clouds of glory do they come” from the place
where all things are possible, where any delightful thing may happen.
Let us believe that our miserable limitations of time and space and
the laws of matter irk them inconceivably, imprison the free soul as
a wild bird in a cage. If we refuse to give the child outlets into
the realms of fancy, where everything is possible, the delicate Ariel
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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