Perkins of Portland: Perkins The Great — John Shaqi
Perkins of Portland: Perkins The GreatButler, Ellis Parker
General
Perkins of Portland: Perkins The Great
Butler, Ellis Parker
Advertising -- Fiction; Humorous stories
When we once got those churches on the move, there seemed to be no
stopping. We doubled the price, but still people wanted those lots, and
in the end they got them; and as soon as we sold out a church lot,
we moved the church up to Fifth Street, and in a bit Perkins got
enthusiastic over the idea, and moved the rest of the churches there on
his own accord. He said it would be a great “ad.”--a street of churches;
and it would concentrate the ennobling religious atmosphere, and make it
more powerful.
All this time the lots continued to sell beyond our expectations; and
by the end of the year we had advanced the price of lots one hundred per
cent., and were considering another advance. We did not think it fair to
the sweltering Chicago public to advance the price without giving it a
chance to get the advantage of our fresh air and pure water at the old
price, so we told them of the contemplated rise. We let them know it by
means of bill-boards and newspapers and circular letters and magazines;
and a great many people gladly availed themselves of our thoughtfulness
and our guarantee that we would advance the price twenty-per cent, on
the first day of June.
So many, in fact, bought lots before the advance that we had none left
to advance. Perkins came to me one morning, with tears in his eyes,
and explained that we had made a promise, and could not keep it. We
had agreed to advance the lots twenty per cent., and we had nothing to
advance.
“Well, Perky,” I said, “it is no use crying. What is done is done. Are
you sure there are no lots left?”
“William,” he said, seriously, “we think a great deal of these churches,
don't we?”
“Yes!” I exclaimed. “We do! We think an ennobling religious
atmosphere--” But he cut me short.
“William,” he said, “do you know what we are doing? We talk about our
ennobling religious atmosphere, but we are standing in the path of
progress. A mighty wave of reform is sweeping through Christendom.
The new religious atmosphere is sweeping out the old religious
atmosphere. I can feel it. Brotherly love is knocking out the sects.
Shall Cloverdale cling to the old, or shall it stand as the leader in
the movement for a reunited Church?”
I clasped Perkins's hand.
“A tabernacle!” I cried.
“Right!” exclaimed Perkins. “Why ten conflicting churches? Why not one
grand meeting-place--all faiths--no creeds! Bring the people closer
together--spread an ennobling religious atmosphere that is worth talking
about!”
“Perkins,” I said, “what you have done for religion will not be
forgotten.”
He waved my praise away airily.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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