Americans -- England -- Fiction; Authors -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction; Love stories
But,
it's no good ... I can't do that ... this is really one of those moments
when I feel as if I was still seventeen years old ... shyness, I suppose
... yet the rest of my family aren't shy."
This took John's thoughts back to his relations, but to a much less
complacent point of view of them than before that maliciously apposite
remark overheard in the saloon had lighted up the group as abruptly and
unbecomingly as a magnesium flash. However inconsistent he might appear,
he was afraid that he should be more critical of them in future. He
began to long to talk over his affairs with that girl and, looking up at
this moment, he caught her eyes, which either because the weather was so
gusty or because he was so ready to hang decorations round a simple fact
seemed to him like calm moorland pools, deep violet-brown pools in
heathery solitudes. Her complexion had the texture of a rose in
November, the texture that gains a rare lucency from the grayness and
moisture by which one might suppose it would be ruined. She was wearing
a coat and skirt of Harris tweed of a shade of misty green, and with her
slim figure and fine features she seemed at first glance not more than
twenty. But John had not passed her another half-dozen times before he
had decided that she was almost a woman of thirty. He looked to see if
she was wearing a wedding ring and was already enough interested in her
to be glad that she was not. This relief was, of course, not at all due
to any vision of himself in a more intimate relationship; but merely
because he was glad to find that her personality, of which he was by now
more definitely aware than of her beauty (well, not beauty, but charm,
and yet perhaps after all he was being too grudging in not awarding her
positive beauty) would be her own. There was something distinctly
romantic in this beautiful young woman of nearly thirty leading her own
life unimpeded by a loud-voiced husband. Of course, the husband might
have had a gentle voice, but usually this type of woman seemed a prey to
bluffness and bigness, as if to display her atmosphere charms she had
need of a rugged landscape for a background. He found himself glibly
thinking of her as a type; but with what type could she be classified?
Surely she was attracting him by being exceptional rather than typical;
and John soothed his alarmed celibacy by insisting that she appealed to
him with a hint of virginal wisdom which promised a perfect intercourse,
if only their acquaintanceship could be achieved naturally, that is to
say, without the least suggestion of an ulterior object. _She had never
been a poor relation yet, and she did not intend to start being one
now._ Of course, such a woman was still unmarried. But how had she
avoided being a poor relation? What was her work? Why was she coming
home to England? And who was her companion? He looked at the other woman
who walked beside her with a boyish slouch, wore gold pince-nez, and had
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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