And he stoppeth one of three-- The famous shortstop threw the book out the window, stuck out his chin and said: "No Texas sis can gimme de umpire face like dat. I swipes nine daisy cutters outer ten dat comes in my garden, I do." Toddlekins Toddlekins climbed up the long, long stair; Chubby and fat and round was he; With rosy cheeks and curling hair, Jolly and fair and gay was he. Toddlekins knocked on the office door; Within at a desk a stern man sat; Wrote with a pen while a frown he wore, When he heard on the door a rat-tat-tat. Toddlekins cried, "Oh please let me in! I've come to see you, the door is fast!" Oh, voice so soft, it will surely win The heart of the stern, cold man at last! But he heeded not the pleading cry Of Toddlekins out on the lonely stair; And Toddlekins left with a sorrowful sigh, Toddlekins round, and chubby and fair, Oh, man so stem, when you stand and plead At the door of your Father's house on high; What if he, merciless, pay no heed; Pitiless, turns from your helpless cry! But the man wrote on with a stony stare; He was an editor, poor and ill; And Toddlekins, chubby and round and fair, Was a butcher that brought a big meat bill. Reconciliation A One-Act Drama Dramatis Personae A Houston married couple. Scene--Her boudoir. He And now, Viola, since we understand each other, let us never fall out again. Let us forget the bitter words that we have spoken one to another, and resolve to dwell always in love and affection. [Places his arm around her waist.] She Oh, Charles, you don't know how happy you make me! Of course we will never quarrel again. Life is too short to waste in petty bickerings and strife. Let us keep in the primrose path of love, and never stray from it any more. Oh, what bliss to think you love me and nothing can ever come between us! Just like the old days when we used to meet by the lilac hedge, isn't it? [Lays her head on his shoulder.] He Yes, and when I used to pull blossoms and twine them in your hair and call you Queen Titania. She Oh, that was nice. I remember. Queen Titania? Oh, yes, she was one of Shakespeare's characters, who fell in love with a man with a donkey's head. He H'm! She Now don't. I didn't mean you. Oh, Charles, listen to the Christmas chimes! What a merry day it will be for us. Are you sure you love me as well as you used to? He More. _Smack._ She Does 'em fink me sweet? He _Smack. Smack!_ She Wuz 'em's toodleums? He Awful heap. Who do you wuv? She My ownest own old boy. Both _Smack!_ He Listen, the bells are chiming again. We should be doubly happy, love, for we have passed through stormy seas of doubt and anger. But now, a light is breaking, and the rosy dawn of love has returned. She And should abide with us forever. Oh, Charles, let us never again by word or look cause pain to each other. He Never again. And you will not scold any more?