JOHN. By the hokey, Briget, this is grand news! Outrageous. When’s Professor Tim coming? MRS. S. He doesn’t say when. He’s just arrived in London from Africa. He may come here any day. JOHN. I’ll be outrageous glad to see Professor Tim. Glad on your account, Briget, and glad on his own.... But, three guesses, who’s coming down our lane at this minute? MRS. S. Himself! The Professor. JOHN. Wrong, Briget. Guess again. MRS. S. Ach, don’t annoy me! Who’s coming? JOHN. Mr. James J. Kilroy, the Rural Councillor, and his son Joseph. Hey! there’s more news for you. MRS. S. Well, keep on your head, John. We don’t owe the Kilroys anything. JOHN. They’re driving. An atrocious fine pony and rubber-wheel trap. I wonder what they want here, Briget. Such grand people. MRS. S. They’ll probably be able to explain that when they come in. If their grandeur frightens you, it doesn’t frighten me. Go and meet them and take them round to the hall door. And no scraping or touching your hat to them. Don’t be a serf. JOHN. You’re a wonderful woman [_going_]. Outrageous. MRS. S. Stop a minute, John. How often have I told you to stop using those two big words, outrageous and atrocious? Flinging them round you like paving-stones, and the whole parish laughing at you. JOHN. It’s just a habit, Briget. Only a habit. I’ve tried my best to drop them, but it beats me. I must try again. [_Goes out back._] MRS. S. Is the parlour tidy, Peggy? PEGGY. Yes. I dusted it and opened the windows. MRS. S. Did you know these people were coming? PEGGY. I thought they might drop in going past to the auction. MRS. S. Why, of course, that’s it. They’re going to the auction. Go and let them in. PEGGY. Ah, mother, let them in yourself. I’m dirty. MRS. S. So am I. But I’m clean enough for the Kilroys. [_Goes out left._] PEGGY. Now for the match-making! [_Voices are heard in the yard. She goes to the window._] Oh, holy father! _JOHN ushers in through the back door JAMES KILROY and son JOSEPH._ JOHN. The good-woman’ll kill me for bringing you in the back door, Mr. Kilroy. She said I was to take you round to the front. We’ve a fine hall door, sir. Varnished and all. Outrageous. KILROY. This is first rate, John. First rate. Good morning, Miss Scally. PEGGY. Good morning, Mr. Kilroy. JOSEPH. Mornin’, Pegness! PEGGY. Good morning, Joseph. _MRS. SCALLY comes in._ JOSEPH. Mornin’, mother Scally! MRS. S. Good morning, everybody. I told John to take you round to the front, Mr. Kilroy. But you mightn’t try to tell John anything. KILROY. This is first rate, Mrs. Scally. First rate. [_Inspects it_] Very clean and neat and up-to-date. Sanitary. MRS. S. Indeed it isn’t clean at all. We must get the whole house cleaned down from top to bottom, for my brother--the Professor--is going to pay us a visit shortly. He’s in London at present. He hasn’t been home for twenty years.