Psmith in the CityWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Psmith in the City
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
On the Monday morning a letter arrived from Psmith. Psmith was still
perturbed. 'Commerce,' he wrote, 'continues to boom. My pater referred
to Comrade Bickersdyke last night as a Merchant Prince. Comrade B. and
I do not get on well together. Purely for his own good, I drew him
aside yesterday and explained to him at great length the frightfulness
of walking across the bowling-screen. He seemed restive, but I was
firm. We parted rather with the Distant Stare than the Friendly Smile.
But I shall persevere. In many ways the casual observer would say that
he was hopeless. He is a poor performer at Bridge, as I was compelled
to hint to him on Saturday night. His eyes have no animated sparkle of
intelligence. And the cut of his clothes jars my sensitive soul to its
foundations. I don't wish to speak ill of a man behind his back, but I
must confide in you, as my Boyhood's Friend, that he wore a made-up tie
at dinner. But no more of a painful subject. I am working away at him
with a brave smile. Sometimes I think that I am succeeding. Then he
seems to slip back again. However,' concluded the letter, ending on an
optimistic note, 'I think that I shall make a man of him yet--some
day.'
Mike re-read this letter in the train that took him to London. By this
time Psmith would know that his was not the only case in which Commerce
was booming. Mike had written to him by return, telling him of the
disaster which had befallen the house of Jackson. Mike wished he could
have told him in person, for Psmith had a way of treating unpleasant
situations as if he were merely playing at them for his own amusement.
Psmith's attitude towards the slings and arrows of outrageous Fortune
was to regard them with a bland smile, as if they were part of an
entertainment got up for his express benefit.
Arriving at Paddington, Mike stood on the platform, waiting for his box
to emerge from the luggage-van, with mixed feelings of gloom and
excitement. The gloom was in the larger quantities, perhaps, but the
excitement was there, too. It was the first time in his life that he
had been entirely dependent on himself. He had crossed the Rubicon. The
occasion was too serious for him to feel the same helplessly furious
feeling with which he had embarked on life at Sedleigh. It was possible
to look on Sedleigh with quite a personal enmity. London was too big to
be angry with. It took no notice of him. It did not care whether he was
glad to be there or sorry, and there was no means of making it care.
That is the peculiarity of London. There is a sort of cold
unfriendliness about it. A city like New York makes the new arrival
feel at home in half an hour; but London is a specialist in what Psmith
in his letter had called the Distant Stare. You have to buy London's
good-will.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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