A touch, a smack! A boxèd ear. There came the sound of a smart slap. The Fairy Prince, with cry of fear, His hand unto his cheek did clap. The Sleeping Beauty gave a gape, A wide-mouthed yawn, a long-drawn stretch. _He_ rubbed his chins. "This _is_ a jape! I _knew_ my style the girl would fetch! "In spite of all that WILSON says,[*] I trust those Revenue Returns. She _does_ revive! Be mine the praise! By Jove, though, how my left ear burns! I told 'em that I'd do the trick With my new fakement, the Death Duties. Come, Miss, wake up! Revive, dear, quick! You sleepiest of Sleeping Beauties!" At last sweet slumbering Trade awoke, And on her couch her form upreared. The Prince smiled, rubbed his chins, and spoke. "Ah, WILSON'S prophecy is queered. He swore that you would _not_ revive, In his Cassandra-like Review, But don't sit yawning! Look alive! Or men will swear I've humbugged you!" "All right!" said sleepy Trade. "But still My joints feel somewhat stiff or so. Say, have you passed that Irish Bill You schemed--_how_ long was it ago?" The Chancellor subdued a curse, Which scarce would serve for a reply, But dallied with his well-filled purse, And smiling, put the question by. [Footnote: * In a pessimistic editorial article, opening the new volume of the _Investor's Review_.] * * * * * A TALL ORDER. ["The Emperor WILLIAM is to have the Grand Order of the Imperial Chrysanthemum (the Japanese Garter) to add to his collection, 'in recognition of the services rendered by German officers to Japanese officers in instructing them in military and naval science.'"--_Daily Chronicle._] Oh, the Fatherland, the happy Fatherland, With fresh happiness will hum, When their Emperor shall the Order wear Of the Jap Chry-san-the-mum! He's "a daisy" now, as the world doth know; But, oh! _won't_ he be thrice happy, When he sports the badge of the Golden Flower Of the cute and grateful Jappy? If JOHN CHINAMAN in the little Jap Has most surely caught a Tartar, Jap learned to war 'neath the Teuton Star, So will send him the Jap "Garter." BULL has given him tips, and has built him ships, But the Jap don't badge J. B. No! Peace and War, like most other things, Are now "made in Ger-ma-ny"! * * * * * "SENTIMENT" FOR OLD-FASHIONED PLAY-GOERS.--"May that confounded 'Woman with a Past,' who monopolises the Present, have no Future!" * * * * * [Illustration: A WINTER'S TALE. _Benevolent Person_ (_recognising an old protégé_). "ROGERS, I'M SORRY TO SEE YOU IN THIS CONDITION! I UNDERSTOOD YOU HAD TAKEN THE PLEDGE!" _Rogers._ "YOU'RE QUI' RI', SIR. ONLY Y' SEE THE WATER'S FROZEN 'T THE MAIN DOWN OUR STREET!"] * * * * * THAT PRECIOUS DONKEY!