_Charles._ Why, that quiet, modest friend of yours, Mr. CLARENCE CURPHEW, if you _must_ know! _Mrs. Toov._ I don't believe it. Mr. CURPHEW is not at all the sort of young man to spend his money in such resorts. _Charles._ He don't _spend_ it there--he _makes_ it. My dear Aunt, you ought to feel honoured by having such a distinguished acquaintance. Don't you remember my mentioning the great music-hall star, WALTER WILDFIRE? You must. Well, CLARENCE CURPHEW and WALTER WILDFIRE are one and the same person--honour bright, they are! _Mrs. Toov._ (_sinking back with a gasp_). A--a music-hall star! And I have been urging ALTHEA to---- Oh, how fortunate it is I have been warned in time! He shall not see her--I will write and put him off--at once! [Mr. TOOVEY _enters blandly_. _Mr. Toov._ Ah, CHARLES, my boy, so here you are? that's right, that's right. You, too, CORNELIA? (_To her, in an undertone._) It's all right, my love--our dear young friend, Mr. CURPHEW, you know--we met on the doorstep just now, and I've left him and THEA together in the drawing-room. I thought it was best, eh? [_He looks to her for approval._ _Mrs. Toov._ You've left---- But there, I might have known! No, don't speak to me, Pa--there's no time to lose! Come with me, CHARLES, I may want you. [_She rustles out of the room, followed by_ CHARLES. _Mr. Toov._ (_looking after her in mild perplexity_). Dear, dear me! I wonder what can be the matter _now_. CORNELIA seems so very---- I hardly like to go and see--and yet, perhaps, I ought--perhaps I ought. There's one comfort, whatever it is, it can't have anything to do with that dreadful Eldorado. Yes, I'd better go and look into it! [_He goes out._--_End of Scene XVI._ * * * * * [Illustration: "USING LANGUAGE." _The Squire._ "WELL, SMITH, I WANT YOUR ADVICE. HADN'T WE BETTER LET THEM HAVE THEIR WAY THIS TIME?" _Smith._ "NO, NO, SIR. STICK TO YOUR RIGHTS! WHAT _I_ SAY IS--'GIVE SUCH PEOPLE A HINCH AND THEY'LL TAKE A HELL'--IF YOU'LL PARDON MY USIN' SUCH STRONG LANGUAGE!"] * * * * * MAGIC AND MANUFACTURES. (_A Fairy Fragment from the German._) Little ALICE was delighted with her surroundings. She had found her way into a lumber-room, which was filled with modern furniture and modern toys. "How pretty they are!" she exclaimed; "and how I would like to speak to them!" Then the Cup and Saucer labelled a "Present from Ramsgate," and the Old Grandfather's Clock glowed with satisfaction. Evidently they wished to join in the conversation. Then ALICE thought that perhaps she might raise a sprite or a goblin of some magical person by reading ANDERSEN'S Fairy Stories backward. She had scarcely, with some difficulty, completed the first page (rendered reversely) of "The Shepherdess and the Brave Tin Soldier," when an old lady, about eighteen inches high, suddenly appeared before her.