Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 104, March 25, 1893Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 104, March 25, 1893
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Dr. Herd._ Yes, you may well say so, HILDA. Still--(_dubiously_)--it
_does_ occur to me that such doings may perhaps be misunderstood--by
the narrow-minded and conventional.
[_They go on the lawn, and sit down._
_Hilda_ (_with an outburst_). Oh, that all seems to me so foolish--so
irrelevant! As if the whole thing wasn't intended as an Allegory!
_Dr. Herd._ (_relieved_). Ah, so long as it is merely _allegorical_ of
course---- But what is it an allegory _of_, HILDA?
_Hilda_ (_reflects in vain_). How can you sit there and ask such
questions? I suppose I am a symbol, of some sort.
_Dr. Herd._ (_as a thought flashes upon him_). A cymbal? That would
certainly account for your bra---- Then am _I_ a cymbal too, HILDA?
_Hilda._ Why yes--what else? You represent the Artist-worker, or
the Elder Generation, or the Pursuit of the Ideal, or a Bilious
Conscience--or something or other. _You_'re all right!
_Dr. Herd._ (_shakes his head_). Am I? But I don't quite see---- Well,
well, cymbals are meant to clash a little. And I see plainly now that
I ought to prescribe this powder for as many as possible. Isn't it
terrible, HILDA, that so many poor souls never really die their
own deaths--pass out of the world without even the formality of an
inquest? As the district Coroner, I feel strongly on the subject.
_Hilda._ And, when the Coroner has finished sitting on all the bodies,
perhaps--but I shan't tell you now. (_Speaks as if to a child._)
There, run away and finish making the Rainbow-powder, do!
_Dr. Herd._ (_skips up into the Dispensary_). I will--I will! Oh, I do
feel such a troll--such a light-haired, light-headed old devil!
_Ruebub_ (_enters garden-gate_). I have had my dismissal--but I'm not
going without saying good-bye to Mrs. HERDAL.
_Hilda._ Dr. HERDAL would disapprove--you really must not, Mr.
KALOMEL. And, besides, Mrs. HERDAL is not at home. She is in the town
buying me a reel of cotton. _Dr._ HERDAL is in. He is making real
Rainbow powders for regenerating everybody all round. Won't _that_ be
fun?
_Ruebub._ _Making_ powders? Ha! ha! But you will see he won't _take_
one himself. It is quite notorious to us younger men that he simply
daren't do it.
[Illustration: "My--_my_ Pill-Doctor!"]
_Hilda._ (_with a little snort of contempt_). Oh, I daresay--that's so
likely! (_Defiantly._) I know he _can_, though. I've _seen_ him!
_Ruebub._ There is a tradition that he once--but not now--he knows
better. I think you said Mrs. HERDAL was in the town? I will go and
look for her. I understand her so well. [_Goes out by gate._
_Hilda_ (_calls_). Dr. HERDAL! Come out this minute. I want
you--awfully!
_Dr. Herd._ (_puts his head out_). Just when I am making such
wonderful progress with the powder! (_Comes down and leans on a
table._) Have you hit upon some way of giving it to ALINE? I thought
if you were to put it in her arrowroot----?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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