_Question._ What is the _specialité_ of a Briton? _Answer._ That given him by belonging to a race of born athletes. _Q._ Can any member of the human family outside the British Isles do anything in the shape of sport? _A._ Only imperfectly. However, Australians are good at cricket, and Americans have been known to adequately train racehorses. _Q._ Can you give any reason for their partial success? _A._ Yes. Australians are our first-cousins, and Americans our first-cousins once removed. _Q._ Then you consider them of the same stock as the true Briton? _A._ Quite so. Hence their prowess in the field. _Q._ What do you think of foreigners? _A._ That they are typified by "Moosoo." _Q._ When you speak of "Moosoo," to whom do you refer? _A._ To the average French duffer, who has about as much knowledge of sport as a baby in arms. _Q._ Are all foreigners duffers? _A._ All; without exception. _Q._ How do they go out shooting? _A._ With a horn, a _couteau de chasse_, a toy game-bag, and a decorated poodle. _Q._ Can they row at all? _A._ Not seriously. They can paddle a little, but have no more idea of pulling than the man in the moon. _Q._ And yet, did not a Paris crew beat a Thames Eight, on the Seine, early in the present year? _A._ Yes; but that was because there was some good reason or other for the English defeat. _Q._ It could not have been, of course, because the French Eight was better than their visitors? _A._ Certainly not. _Q._ But is not that the view you would adopt if you were dealing with two English crews? _A._ Why, certainly; but this was a race between Britons and Frenchman, and the former could not naturally be beaten by the latter on their own merits. _Q._ Why not? _A._ Because, as a matter of fact, they couldn't. _Q._ And so your opinion of the superiority of Britons over foreigners is unalterable? _A._ Of course. I should not be a Briton if it were not so. * * * * * [Illustration: DECIDEDLY PLEASANT. _Genial Youth._ "I SAY, GUBBY, OLD CHAP, IS THIS REALLY TRUE ABOUT YOUR GOING TO MARRY MY SISTER EDIE?" _Gubbins._ "YES, TOMMY. IT'S ALL SETTLED. BUT WHY DO YOU ASK?" _G. Y._ "OH! ONLY BECAUSE I SHALL HAVE SUCH A JOLLY SLACK TIME NOW! YOU KNOW _I'VE_ PULLED OFF NEARLY ALL HER ENGAGEMENTS SO FAR, ONLY YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE WHO'S BEEN A _REAL STAYER_!!"] * * * * * A DECAYED INDUSTRY. (_From the Note-book of Our Prophet-Reporter._) [Illustration] The HOME SECRETARY was seated in his room awaiting the arrival of the Deputation:-- "Well, I suppose I was right to allow them to interview me," he murmured. "The submerged Tenth have not the franchise to-day. Ah! but they may have it to-morrow!" The HOME SECRETARY'S exclamation was caused by the appearance of a number of half-starved ragamuffins, who had lounged into the room, and were now standing respectfully before him.