Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, August 19th 1893 — John Shaqi
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, August 19th 1893Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, August 19th 1893
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Incidentally provided TIM HEALY with opportunity for making speech
quite in old (of late unfamiliar) form. One of P. S.'s clauses
designed for appointment of Boundary Commissioners, with view of
what T. W. RUSSELL described as "ojus jerrymandering." TIM declared
that scheme proposed by Bill would give Unionists a much larger
representation than they were entitled to, leaving them, with
exception of disfranchisement of Dublin University, in very much same
numbers as they now stand. Demonstrating this, TIM cited in detail
the constituencies affected. Totted them up to reach the total he had
affirmed--certainly eighteen, possibly twenty-one.
"There's Armagh two," he said, "and Antrim four. Four and two are
six," he added, turning with defiant look upon the placid figure of
T. W. RUSSELL. Paused for a moment to give full opportunity for anyone
getting up to deny this proposition. No response; TIM proceeded; "Very
well, six. There's Belfast four. Six and four are ten!" he shouted
triumphantly, looking across at JOSEPH. "Very well, ten," he added, in
low growl; evidently disappointed at lack of spirit in camp opposite.
"Down--North, East and West Down you'll have, I suppose? That's three.
Three and ten's thirteen. Thirteen!" he shouted, turning with quick
flush of hope in direction of seat of EDWARD OF ARMAGH. But Colonel
not there. In fact not been seen in House since he went out after the
great fight, holding bunch of keys to his bruised cheek.
Things looking desperate; still TIM plodded on. Surely age of
chivalry not so finally gone that there was not left in an Irish bosom
sufficient courage to deny to a political adversary that two and two
made four? Perhaps TIM had been piling on the units too high. He would
continue on a lower scale. "Very well, that's thirteen. Now North
Fermanagh's one. Thirteen and one's fourteen." No pen can describe the
acrimony TIM threw into this proposition. Still the craven blood did
not stir. "Londonderry, North, South, and City--I suppose you expect
to collar them all? That's three; fourteen and three are seventeen."
It was terrible. The SPEAKER, fearing bloodshed, interposed, ruling
TIM out of order; only just in time. One could see by flush on
MACARTNEY'S cheek that one step more would have been fatal, and that
the proposition "Seventeen and two are nineteen" would have led to
outbreak beside which the "regrettable incident" would have been
meretriciously mild.
_Business done._--Took up Report Stage of Home-Rule Bill.
[Illustration: "Bimetallism."]
_Tuesday._--The Squires had regular set-to to-night. He of Blankney
began it; SQUIRE OF MALWOOD, never loath for a tussle, cheerfully
stepping into the ring. Order of the day was Report Stage of Home-Rule
Bill. Members, though in languid mood, prepared once more to tread the
dreary round, to pass a summer night
In dropping buckets into empty wells,
And growing old in drawing nothing up.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account