* * * * * TRIP-LETS. [Miss YOUNG writes from North Merton Vicarage to say that her turkeys have taken to step-dancing. "First two young 'toms' bowed politely to one another, then passed on with stately tread, skipped into the air twice in the most ludicrous manner, turned, and repeated the performance."--_See Daily Graphic, December 7._] The lion, fleas, and kangaroo, Baboon, and shaving baby too, Have all had shows--here's something new! Terpsichore and _Turveydrop_ Have taught the turkeycock to hop, To bow politely, skip and flop. Like Cheshire cat, I would have grinned, To see the fowl of Western Ind Disport itself like LETTY LIND! Enough of barn-and serpent-dance! We'll give the poultry-yard a chance-- With _pas de deux_-"_toms_" let us prance! * * * * * CHARITY'S CRUX.--Charity begins at home, we are told. Perhaps. But at present, confused by rival claims and conflicting counsels, Charity seems to be "all abroad." * * * * * [Illustration: CHANGE OF PARTNERS. PRESIDENT CLEVELAND ASKS FOR "JUST ONE TURN" WITH MISS FREE TRADE.] * * * * * [Illustration: "NEXT HER HEART!" _Young Muddleigh, who has been out buying underwear for his personal use, purchases at the same establishment some flowers for his ladyelove--leaving a Note to be enclosed. Imagine Young Muddleigh's horror, on returning to dress, to discover that the underwear had been sent with the Note, and the Flowers to him! Muddleigh discovered, repeating slowly to himself the contents of the Note_:--"PLEASE WEAR THESE THIS EVENING, FOR MY SAKE!"] * * * * * A CHANGE OF PARTNERS. ["The world should be open to our national ingenuity and enterprise. This cannot be while Federal legislation, through the imposition of a high tariff, forbids to American manufacturers as cheap materials as those used by their competitors.... A measure has been prepared ... embodying tariff reform on the lines herein suggested."--_President Cleveland's Message to Congress_.] GROVER CLEVELAND _sings_:-- (AIR--"_Are you coming to the dancing?_") Oh! there's only one girl in the world for whom I care a dime, And I mean to be her partner--if you'll only give me time. It is nice to see her smiling and a-calling from way over, "Are you coming to the dancing, Mister GROVER, GROVER, GROVER?" _Chorus_--Are you coming, are you coming, Are you coming to the dancing, Mr. GROVER, GROVER, GROVER? And I say, I guess I'm coming, Miss Free Trade, dear--as your lover! "Come, GROVER, come!" my love will say; "just one turn in the dance, And _we_'ll show all competitors they have but little chance. That's why I love you GROVER, 'cause you're limber in your feet And defy the other fellows, to compete, pete, pete!"