Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 107, December 15th, 1894Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 107, December 15th, 1894
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Und._ (_blinking and gasping_). I--eh? Just so, that--that _was_ my
intention, certainly. (_To himself._) Does she at all realise what
this will cost her?
_Lady Culv._ My dear Mr. BLAIR, I--I'd no notion we were to lose you
so soon; but if you're really quite _sure_ you must go----
_Lady Cant._ (_sharply_). Really, ALBINIA, we must give him credit for
knowing his own mind. He tells you he is _obliged to go!_
_Lady Culv._ Then of course we must let you do _exactly_ as you
please. (_All, except_ Miss SPELWANE, _breathe more freely_; TREDWELL
_appears_.) Oh, lunch, is it, TREDWELL? Very well. By-the-bye, see
that some one packs Mr. UNDERSHELL'S things for him, and tell them
to send the dogcart round after lunch in time to catch the 3.15 from
Shuntingbridge.
_Pill._ (_sotto voce, to_ ARCHIE). And let us pray that the cart is
properly balanced _before_ starting, _this_ time!
_Miss Spelwane_ (_to herself, piqued_). Going already! I wish I had
never touched his ridiculous snowdrops!
_Lady Culv._ Well, shall we go in to lunch, everybody?
[_They move in irregular order towards the Dining Hall._
_Und._ (_in an undertone to_ Lady MAISIE, _as they follow last_). Lady
MAISIE, I--er--this is just a _little_ unexpected. I confess I don't
quite understand your precise motive in suggesting so--so hasty a
departure.
_Lady Maisie_ (_without looking at him_). Don't you, Mr. BLAIR?
Perhaps--when you come to think over it all quietly--you _will_.
[_She passes on, leaving him perplexed._
_Und._ (_to himself_). Shall I? I certainly can't say I do
just----Why, yes, I _do!_ That bully SPURRELL with his beastly
horsewhip! She dreads an encounter between us--and I should much
prefer to avoid it myself. Yes, that's it, of course; she is willing
to sacrifice anything rather than endanger _my_ personal safety! What
unselfish angels some women are! Even that sneering fellow DRYSDALE
will be impressed when I tell him this.... Yes, it's best that I
should go--I see that now. I don't so much mind leaving. Without any
false humility, I can hardly avoid seeing that, even in the short time
I have been among these people, I have produced a decided impression.
And there is at least one--perhaps _two_--who will miss me when I am
gone.
[_He goes into the Dining Hall, with restored equanimity._
THE END.
* * * * *
ROBERT ON HUNIFIKASHUN!
I have bin a having quite a long tork with a most respecful looking
Gent who tells me he is a reel County Counsellor, and that they has a
Gildhall of their own at Charing Cross, where they meets ewery week,
the same as the Common Counsellors does at their reel Gildhall in the
Citty, and that they has quite made up their minds to make the two
Gildhalls into one and have them both for theirselves, and that that
will be what they calls Hunifikashun, which means everything for them
and not nothink for nobody else.
[Illustration]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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