Says he, "I scoff at raisons, and stale talk of toimes and saisons; I'm game to shoot a fox, or spear a stag, stag, stag; Nay, I'd net, or club, a salmon; your old rules of sport are gammon, For wid me it's just a question of the bag, bag, bag! "There are omadhauns, I know, who would let a foine buck go Just bekase 'twas out of toime, or they'd no gun, gun, gun; But if oi can hit, and hurt, wid a pistol--or a squirt-- By jabers, it is all the betther fun, fun, fun!" So he scurryfunged around with his stomach on the ground (For stalking seems of crawling a mere branch, branch, branch). And he spied "a stag of ten," and he cried, "Hurroo! Now then, I fancy I can hit _him_--in the haunch, haunch haunch! "Faix! I'll bag that foine Stag Royal, or at any rate oi'll troy all The devoices of a sportshman from the Oisle, Oisle, Oisle. One who's used to shoot asprawl from behoind a hedge or wall, At the risks of rock and heather well may smoile, smoile, smoile!" But our sportsman bold, though silly, by a stalwart Highland gillie, Was right suddenly arrested ere he fired, fired, fired.-- "Hoots! If you'll excuse the hint, that old thing, with lock of flint, As a weapon for _this_ sport can't be admired, mired, mired! "It will not bring down _that_ quarry, your horse-pistol! Don't _you_ worry! That Royal Stag _we_'ll stalk, boy, in good time, time, time; But to pop at it just now, and kick up an awful row, Scare, and _miss_ it were a folly, nay a crime, crime, crime! "Be you sure 'Our Party' will this fine quarry track and kill; Our guns need not your poor toy blunderbuss, buss, buss. This is not the time or place for a-following up this chase; So just clear out and leave this game to us, us, us!" * * * * * [Illustration: "A LITTLE TOO PREVIOUS!" H-RC-RT. "NO, NO, MY LAD! THAT WON'T HURT HIM! YOU MUST LEAVE HIM TO _US_!"] * * * * * IN MEMORIAM. [Baron MUNDY, the founder of the valuable Vienna Voluntary Sanitary Ambulance Society, mighty foe of disease and munificent dispenser of charity, shot himself on Thursday, August 23, on the banks of the Danube, at the advanced age of 72.] Great sanitary leader and reformer, Disease's scourge and potent pest-house stormer; Successful foe of cholera aforetime, Perfecter of field-ambulance in war-time; Dispenser of a fortune in large charity; _Vale!_ Such heroes are in sooth a rarity. Alas, that you in death should shock Dame GRUNDY! That we should sigh "_Sic transit gloria_ MUNDY!" * * * * * A CLOTHES DIVISION (OF OPINION).--It is said that Woman cannot afford to alter her style of dress, since her limbs are "all wrong." Clear, therefore, that however much Woman's Wrongs need redressing, All-Wrong Women don't! * * * * * [Illustration: Q. E. D.