"The Frank desires to mizzle, His Panama's a fizzle. BULL, in his land of drizzle, Is jealous as cm be, O! But merry may our Kiel grow, &c." * * * * * Mr. F. J. HORNIMAN, F.R.G.S., tea-merchant, has accepted the invitation to oppose Mr. CAVENDISH BENTINCK, Conservative M.P., for the united borough of Penryn, Flushing, and Falmouth. It is anticipated, says the _Western Daily Mercury_, that he will make a good candidate. Certainly he ought to be able to suit the constituency to a T, unless it continues faithful to its CAVENDISH, in which case his candidature will end in smoke. Mr. HORNIMAN, no doubt, hopes for an early general election, because the longer he stands the greater prospect of his getting what schoolboys call a "tannin'." * * * * * NEW SONG.--"_Goodness' Nose_," By the author of _"Beauty's Eyes"!!_ * * * * * CHATS WITH THE CHILDREN. A COMIC RAILWAY JOURNEY. _Miss Prunes-Prism._ And now, my dear charges, I trust you have utilised the hour that has been hypothecated to enjoyment profitably. _Emily._ Indeed we have, dear governess. I have read to my brother and sister a most amusing account of a railway traveller who wished to get from Bangor to Euston in five hours, and was baffled in the well-intentioned attempt by the clever ingenuity of the railway companies! _Miss Prunes-Prism._ You refer, no doubt, to the gentleman who, having left Bangor at 7.55, reached Llandudno at 8.5, Colwyn Bay at 8.41, Abergele at 8.52, Rhyl at 9.2, and Chester at 9.56. _Margaret._ Yes, dear Miss PRUNES-PRISM; and it is at that point the fun of the railway companies came in. Having arrived at 9.56 he found that the train for London had already left. It was timed to depart for the metropolis exactly one minute before the arrival of his train at 9.55! _Emily._ Indeed, dear governess, the story is vastly entertaining. Then there is a similar arrangement at Crewe Junction. At that centre of popularity a train arrives from a provincial source at 10.48, just one minute later than the advertised time for the departure of the London train. Those who have the framing of these traffic arrangements must be wags of the first water! _Miss Prunes-Prism._ No doubt they are. And now, my dear CHARLES, supposing your dear papa wished to get from Bangor to Euston, what would you advise him to do? _Charles._ I should recommend him to walk. _Miss Prunes-Prism._ I think, my dear child, that your counsel would be sound. And now, my dear charges, having enjoyed our chat, let us return with renewed energy to the consideration of the principal incidents of _Magna Charta_. * * * * * SERIES TO SUCCEED "THE PENNY POETS."--"The Tuppenny-Ha'penny Poetasters." To include the lays of the Logrollerites, and the leading aspirants to the Laureateship. * * * * * ENCORE VERSE.