A BOON TO TESTATORS!--What Offers? A Poor Relation is Willing to Adopt Wealthy Old Lady (without encumbrance), having recently had a difference with his Relatives. Will Gladly exchange Views on the subject with any Benevolent and Elderly Gentlewoman.--"Legatee," c/o SMITHERS, Tobacconist, Old Kent Road. [Illustration] CHANCE FOR PHILANTHROPISTS!--Absolutely Given Away!! After-season Clearance. Professional Man wishes to part with the last of a large assortment of Indigent Relatives. Excellent Opening for Capitalist. Warranted a Steady and Reliable Applicant for Assistance. No Charitable Old Maid should miss this Opportunity.--Address "Ratepayer," care of SMITHERS, Tobacconist. O. K. Road. TWINS!--TWINS!!--TWINS!!!--Do you Want a Pair of Twins, quite new, with good strong voices and hearty appetites? They would appeal _to_ any Mother's Heart. Must reduce establishment. Would hand over to any young Married Couple with a Vacancy. Will take Fox-terrier or Prize Bantam.--"Pater," Letter Box 8 W. WILL ANYONE oblige me with a Third Cousin-Twice-Removed, as my collection of specimens is incomplete? Have Half-step-sister-in-law (very rare variety, and very little worn) to spare.--"G.," "Family Tree" Inn, Hanwell. GEORGE has a Smart and Good-looking Sister, whom he would be glad to swap for some Other Fellow's Sister, of similar appearance. Best Man also wanted.--Address, Bray House, Strand. TO SELL OR EXCHANGE, a Job Lot of Uncles, mostly Wrong 'Uns. Would do for Sandwich-Men or Supers. No cash offer refused.--"A Dutiful Nephew," 1, Queer Street. * * * * * SOMETHING ATTRACTIVE IN A NAME.--Among the directors on the Board of the Mount Torrens Gold Mining Co., Limited, occurs a delightful name which we have not seen in real life since it first appeared in _Strapmore_ many years ago. It is "ALF PINTO"; the surname is "LEITE," and he is "Director of the Miner's Dream Gold Mines, Limited,"--why limit a "dream"? Is it not delightfully attractive? We trust "ALF PINTO" will find plenty of _Whole Quartz O!_ and that the success of the "M. T. G. M." may be the exact opposite of its two first initials, _i.e._, not "M. T." but quite full, up to the brim. * * * * * CANADIAN COPYRIGHT.--_The Author_ says "the much-vexed question of Canadian copyright has at length made some steps towards a settlement." Mr. CAINE, who has sailed for Canada, as one of the "settlers," is equal to "two single gentleman rolled into one," being certainly CAINE and, most decidedly, Able. End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 109, October 12, 1895, by Various