ADMIRABLE CRICHTON, double Blue and double First at Oxford, weary of gerund-grinding at a fashionable preparatory school for L500 a year, charming conversationalist, expert auction-bridge player, is open to accept partnership in well-established financial house on the basis of four months' holiday a year and genuine week-ends--Friday till Tuesday. * * * * * NONCONFORMIST, with open mind on the subject of gambling, but modest means and conscientious objection to hard work, is desirous of meeting liberal-minded philanthropist who will advance him L750 to operate infallible system at Monte Carlo. * * * * * VIGOROUS YOUNG MAN of titled family, who is sick to death of England, is prepared to undertake any duties of a sporting kind for unmarried heiress in America or elsewhere. * * * * * A LADY, whose income is only L4,000 a year, is greatly in need of a month's yachting, but cannot afford a yacht of her own and dislikes the mixed company to be met with on the ordinary advertised cruises. Will some kind friend be so good as to lend her a yacht and endow it? * * * * * UNIVERSITY MAN, strong, healthy, in early forties, who has never done a day's work in his life, but has suddenly fallen on comparative poverty, wishes to communicate with some person of means willing to save him from the pain and indignity of having to do without luxuries which have become second nature to him. * * * * * =L2,000= WANTED, at once, for speculation by Undergraduate. A safe two per cent. offered; advertiser cannot afford more. No professional money-lenders need apply. * * * * * CHRISTIAN and Teetotaler, who has not yet been to Japan, would be quite grateful to any wealthy travel-enthusiast who would make it possible for him to see this fascinating country. Excellent references. * * * * * Illustration: "NOW THEN, COUSIN EMMA, LET ME GIVE YOU A BIT OFF THE BREAST." "YES, PLEASE, I SHOULD LIKE TO TASTE THAT, FOR IN MY YOUNG DAYS THEY ALWAYS GAVE IT TO THE GROWN-UPS, AND NOW THEY KEEP IT FOR THE CHILDREN, SO I'VE ALWAYS MISSED IT." * * * * * REVELATION REVISED. [_A portion of "The Photodrama of Creation," a cinematograph enterprise hailing from the United States, has recently been exhibited._] Oh, would I were a preacher or a prophet Of some wild pagan creed, I know not where-- One of whom people said, "This man is off it" (But still I had a following sparse and rare), That so, if cynics urged, "How hard to prove is The faith ye cling to fondly and so fast!" By favour of the men who work the "movies," I might expound the future and the past.