Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 146, March 11, 1914Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 146, March 11, 1914
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Tuesday._--Another scene testifying to electricity of atmosphere. As
usual, explosion from unexpected quarter. House in committee on Naval
Estimates. Lord ROBERT CECIL, ever alert in interests of working-man with a
vote, moved reduction in order to call attention to housing accommodation
provided for men employed at Rosyth. Chairman ruled debate out of order on
Supplementary Estimates. Lord BOB nevertheless managed to sum up purport of
intended speech by denouncing state of things as "a scandal and disgrace to
the Government." At this stage Opposition Whips, counting heads, discovered
that, if not at the moment in actual minority, Government would, if
division were rushed, find themselves in parlous state. The word--it was
"Mum"--went round Opposition benches.
Unfortunately for success of plot Ministerial Whips also alive to
situation.
"After your ruling, Sir," said Lord BOB with ominous politeness, "I cannot
develop my argument, but I propose to persist in my motion, and will divide
the Committee."
Not if LEIF JONES knew it. For him, as for all good Ministerialists,
subject suddenly developed interest, urgently demanded consideration. This
he proposed to bestow upon it. A Bengal tiger about to lunch off a
toothsome native, discovering the anticipated meal withdrawn from his
reach, could not be more sublimely wrathful than were gentlemen on
Opposition benches. And LEIF JONES, too! The mildest-mannered man that ever
turned on a water-tap.
After a moment of petrified pause, natural to Bengal tiger on discovering
reality of his discomfiture, there burst forth roar of "'Vide! 'Vide!
'Vide!" From appearance of LEIF JONES'S lips, he was continuing his
remarks. Not a syllable rose above the storm. After it had raged for some
moments CHAIRMAN pointed out that, whilst divigation in direction of Rosyth
was out of order, it was competent to any Member to discuss the vote as a
whole.
This too much for A. S. WILSON, who has been surprisingly reticent since
Session opened.
"Is it right for the CHAIRMAN," he asked, "to protect the Government from
what may be an inconvenient position?"
"A grossly disorderly observation," the CHAIRMAN retorted.
A. S. withdrew the remark, the more willingly since designed effect gained.
COUSIN HUGH, for some time moving uneasily in corner seat below Gangway,
bounded to his feet. Member near him simultaneously rose. With sweep of
left arm, after manner of RICHARD III. directing the cutting off of the
head of BUCKINGHAM, he waved the appalled Member down. Was getting on
nicely with what he had to say when, like GRAND CROSS on historical
occasion, he "heard a smile."
It came from WINSTON.
"I notice," said COUSIN HUGH glaring on the Treasury bench, "that the FIRST
LORD OF THE ADMIRALTY, who is very ignorant on many matters, is amused at
this observation."
WINSTON explained that what he had laughed at was "the lordly gesture with
which the noble Lord swept away another honourable gentleman."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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