I have a friend who wrote a book And begged me to peruse it, And bluntly state the view I took-- Encourage or abuse it. I want, he said, the truth alone, But said it in a hopeful tone. Perceiving there was no escape, With Chapter I. I led off; Page 2 provoked my earliest gape, At 3 I yawned my head off, At 4 I cast the thing away Unto some dim and distant day. For weeks I racked my harassed brain For something kind and ruthful, To spare his feelings and remain Comparatively truthful (I'm very often troubled by My inability to lie). "Dear Charles," I wrote him in the end, "I fear no contradiction When I declare that you have penned A healthy work of fiction. I am, I candidly admit, A sounder man through reading it." * * * * * "Captain Turner only got a single when J. W. Hearne bowled him, and lunch was taken. ESSEX. F. L. Fane c. Hendren b. Kidd 57 Russell run out 51 Major Turner b. J. W. Hearne 1" Probably the Major got his step during lunch; and it was no doubt richly deserved, though not on account of the score he had made in the morning as a Captain. * * * * * "John Charles Edmund Carson were the names which Lord Gillford, the infant heir of Lord and Lady Clanwilliam, received yesterday afternoon." _Daily Mail._ If only this were a misprint for John Charles Redmond Carson. * * * * * "The anniversary of the Cattle of the Boyne was celebrated with unusual enthusiasm throughout Canada." _"Times" Toronto Correspondent._ These were the original Irish bulls, we suppose. * * * * * "Plant strawberry runners with grouse on Aug. 12th."--_R.H.S. Gardener's Diary._ "Plant daffodils between grouse and partridges."--_R.H.S. Gardener's Diary._ The daffodils should make good cover, but the runners will stand no chance against the Cockney sportsman. * * * * * Illustration: THE OLD, OLD PROBLEM. IS THE BATSMAN OUT OR NOT? * * * * * EXERCISE 1. I must confess that at one time I had little regard for collectors of cigarette cards; it seemed a feeble pursuit, though perhaps I should add I am of a somewhat intellectual nature. Some little time ago, however, I happened to glance at one of these cards and was surprised to see a picture of a gentleman attired in white flannels and a vest of white, decorated with red embroidery. He was grasping a towel in both hands and appeared to have two or three sets of arms. The label said, "Scarf or Towel Exercises 4." A perusal of the instructions on the back of the card made everything clear.