ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT. [Illustration: PRESS THE BUTTON, AND UP COMES THE GENIE.] _Monday, May 22nd._--Mr. ASQUITH returned to his place to-day, looking all the better for his trip to Ireland. No one was more pleased to see him than Mr. TENNANT, who had been subjected all last week to a galling fire from the Nationalist snipers. Mr. TIMOTHY HEALY had been especially active, employing for the purpose a weapon of unique construction. Although discharged at the Treasury Bench, its most destructive effect is often produced on the Members who sit just behind him. Mr. DILLON is particularly uneasy when Mr. HEALY gets his gun out. When Mr. ACLAND moved the Vote for the Board of Agriculture there were barely two-score of Members present. He made a capital speech, full of attractive detail and delivered with unbucolic gusto, but did not succeed in greatly increasing the number of his audience. There was some excuse perhaps for the non-attendance of the Irish Members. They have an Agricultural Department of their own, presided over by an eminent temperance lecturer who teaches Irish farmers how to grow barley for the national beverage. But it might have been supposed that more Englishmen and Scotsmen would have torn themselves away from their other duties in the smoking-room or elsewhere to hear what the Government had to say about the shortage of labour in the fields. Mr. ACLAND puts his faith in women. If the farmers would only meet them half-way the situation would be saved. Mr. PROTHERO thought the farmers' wives would have something to say about that. They did not like "London minxes trapesing about our farmyard." From their point of view conscientious objectors would be a safer substitute. _Tuesday, May 23rd._--Over ten years have passed since Sir ALFRED HARMSWORTH became Baron NORTHCLIFFE, yet never until to-day, I believe, has he directly addressed his fellow-Peers, though it is understood that through other channels he has occasionally given them the benefit of his counsel. His speech was a sad disappointment to those trade-rivals who have not scrupled to attribute his silence to cowardice or incompetence. No justification for such insinuations was to be found in his speech to-day. He had something practical to say--on Lord MONTAGU's motion regarding the Air-Service--and said it so briefly and modestly as to throw doubt upon the theory that he personally dictates all those leaders in _The Times_ and _The Daily Mail_. Colonel HALL-WALKER took his seat to-day after a re-election necessitated by the transfer of his racing stud to the Government. Up to the present Ministers have found it a Greek gift. To-day they had to withstand a further attack upon their horse-racing proclivities by Lord CLAUD HAMILTON, who, notwithstanding that he is chairman of the railway that serves Newmarket, denounced with great fervour the continuance during the War of this "most extravagant, alluring and expensive form of public amusement."