Mr. FRANK LOCKWOOD, Q.C., M.P., excelled himself in proposing the toast of "The Drama." He contemned the ancient Greek Drama, but was of opinion--Counsel's opinion--or, as he was speaking of the Romans, "Consul's opinion"--that there was "more money in the Latin Drama." _Mr. Punch_, regretted he was not at his learned friend's elbow to suggest, that an apt illustration of the truth of his remark might be found in the success of AUGUSTUS DRURIOLANUS, IMPERATOR. Mr. HENRY IRVING proved, by his perfect recital of CLEMENT SCOTT's verses, how thoroughly "by heart" he had got them. HENRY's "heart is" _not_ "dead" when JOHNNIE is concerned. Sir EDWARD CLARKE, as we learnt from the speeches made by himself, Mr. IRVING, and Mr. TOOLE, seems to have been at school with all the leading Actors; and it was a miracle that he escaped the attractions of the sock and buskin. Pity that the song, "When we were boys, Merry merry boys, When we were boys together," had not been arranged as a trio for them. JOHNNIE was in his best form; very detached, casual, and uncommonly funny. Lord ROSEBERY apologised by letter for not being able to be in Scotland and London at the same time; and the Wicked Abbé BANCROFT in replying to the toast of the Drama, pathetically represented his hard case of being called upon to make an after-dinner speech, when he hadn't had any dinner. The Actor's lot is evidently, not always a happy one. He wanted a "feeding-part" and didn't get it. The dinner was excellent, and the waiting of the waiters was, as far as I could ascertain, exceptionally good. Certainly the Métropole, or the New "Holland" House,--as it might be termed, after its manager,--holds first rank for this sort of business. We present Mr. HOLLAND, the Métropole Caterer, with this suggestion:-- _The Only Condiment for a Farewell Banquet_--"Sauce Ta Ta!" * * * * * AVENUE THEATRE.--ALEXANDER the Growing, not yet the Great, finds that for some weeks to come there will be no necessity to doctor his Bill. He will be wise, however, not to reject any proffered assistance, as, from his present success, it is evident he cannot get on un-Aidé-d. * * * * * [Illustration: HAPPY THOUGHT.] "OH, I SAY, OLD MAN, I WISH YOU'D RUN UPSTAIRS AND HUNT FOR MY AUNT, AND BRING HER DOWN TO SUPPER. SHE'S AN OLD LADY, IN A RED BODY, AND A GREEN SKIRT, AND A BLUE AND YELLOW TRAIN, WITH AN ORANGE BIRD OF PARADISE IN HER CAP. YOU CAN'T _POSSIBLY_ MISTAKE HER. SAY I SENT YOU!" "AWFULLY SORRY, OLD MAN, BUT--A--I'M TOTALLY COLOUR-BLIND, YOU KNOW. JUST BEEN TESTED!" [_Exit in a hurry._ * * * * * THE INCANTATION SCENE. _Freely Adapted from "Der Freischütz."_ _Caspar_, Mr. L-B-CH-RE. _Zamiel_, Mr. P-RN-LL.