_Usher._ Thank you! (_is given a letter by_ Mr. BEERBOHM TREE, _who has reappeared as his own Shadow_). Well, Sirrah, what do _you_ want? _Mr. Tree's Shadow (clearing his throat)._ Urrerrer! Take that to Mr. FERNANDEZ over yonder, and wake him up with it! Urrerrerrer! [_Exit._ _Usher._ With pleasure; but (_smiling_) what a quaint noise! (_Approaching_ Mr. FERNANDEZ.) Monsieur, allow me to offer you my snuff-box--it is heartily at your service. (Mr. FERNANDEZ _accepts the courtesy with effusion_.) And now, my old friend, take this packet, which I fancy is from your wife. I hope Madame is well? (Mr. FERNANDEZ _smilingly bows and eats a sandwich_.) I am delighted to hear it. (_Sternly to_ Mr. TREE, _who has entered in another disguise_.) Well, Monsieur, and what do _you_ want with me? _Mr. Tree in another disguise (seizing the opportunity of showing his well-known versatility)._ I am the Doctor who is attending Madame LAROQUE! She is very ill! Believe me, Usher----(_Makes a pathetic speech in a new voice with appropriate gesticulation, finishing with these words_), and if _he_ dies, _she_ will die also! _Usher (who has been weeping)._ Sad! sad! sad! Ah! Monsieur, you have a hand of silver---- _Mr. Tree (in the other disguise)._ And a heart of gold! [_Exit._ _Usher (wiping his eyes)._ Dear me his story has affected me strangely! But, I must dissemble! Let not the hollow heartless crowd see my emotion! I must laugh and joke, although my heart may be breaking! (_Suddenly._) I will tell a good story to Mr. FERNANDEZ who, I notice, is deeply concerned at the news contained in the letter he has just received from his wife--that news may be the revelation of her own miserable past! (_Approaching the Counsel for the Defence._) Ah, my old and valued friend, let me cheer you up with an amusing anecdote. You must know that once upon a time a man was seated before the kitchen-fire watching a leg of mutton! His dog was seated near him! _Mr. Fernandez (in an undertone--as himself)._ Go away! _Usher (ignoring the interruption)._ The dog seized the mutton, and the man cast the stool after him--thus it was said that two legs, finding four legs had stolen one leg, threw after him three legs! Ha! ha! ha! You will see two legs--the man--four legs, the dog--one leg, the mutton--and three legs, the stool! A quaint conceit! A quaint--ha! ha! ha!--a quaint conceit indeed! _Mr. Fernandez (as before, but more so)._ Go away! [Mr. KEMBLE _here returns, and the_ Usher _resumes his ordinary manner. Scene concluded according to_ Mr. BUCHANAN'S _version_. Wishing you the compliments of the season (in which NORTHBUTT joins), I remain, dear _Mr. Punch_, Yours truly, A BRIEFLESS, JUNIOR. _Pump-handle Court, Temple, 20th Jan., 1890._ * * * * * [Illustration: WHAT OUR ARTIST HAS TO PUT UP WITH. "IT'S VERY ODD--BUT I CAN'T GET RID OF MY PICTURES. THE HOUSE IS FULL OF THEM!"