THE attention of statisticians has lately been directed to a question of no little interest. To put it as shortly as possible, the point is to discover the number and size of the mayonnaises of lobster consumed in the course of one evening in the district bounded on the east by Berkeley Square, and extending westward as far as Earl's Court. It is well-known that no lobster ever walked backwards. Taking this as the basis of our calculations and assuming that [Greek: pi]^{n_1} is equal to the digestive apparatus of six hundred dowagers, we reach the surprising total of 932,146-1/8 lobsters. No allowance is made for dressing or returned empties. * * * * * "A Poet" writes to us as follows:--"I have long been puzzled by the difficulty attending the proper construction of rhymed verse in English. Some words possess many rhymes, others only a few, others again none. Yet I find that the temptation to end a line with a non-rhyme-possessing word like 'month' is almost irresistible, and frequently gives rise to the most painful results. In the course of my emotional ballad entitled, '_The Bard's Daughter_,' I was compelled on an average to kill half-a-dozen German bands every day, and to throw ten jam-pots at my butler for unseasonable interruptions. Can any of your readers help me?" * * * * * A flight of ducks was observed to settle on the Serpentine yesterday at four o'clock exactly. They had been moving in a westerly direction. The Park-keepers explain this curious incident by the well-known affection of these birds for water, combined with an occasional impulse to aërial navigation, but the explanation appears to us inadequate. * * * * * In Vienna the other day, a Cabman was observed to claim more than his fare from an elderly lady, whom he afterwards abused violently in the choicest Austrian for refusing to comply with his demands. After all, the nature of Cabmen all over the world varies very little. Elderly Ladies too, are much the same. * * * * * Mr. STANLEY continues to attend dances, dinners and receptions at the usual hours. He has lately expressed himself in strong terms with regard to the action of a friendly Power on the continent of Africa. Mr. STANLEY appears to think very lightly of the Foreign Office pigeon-holes, in which his treaties have been stored in the meantime. * * * * * [Illustration: A DOUBTFUL COMPLIMENT. _Sympathetic Spinster._ "AND IS YOUR OTHER BOY AT ALL LIKE THIS ONE?" _Proud Mother._ "OH, NO; QUITE A CONTRAST TO HIM!" _Sympathetic Spinster._ "HOW NICE!"] * * * * * IN THE KNOW. (_By Mr. Punch's Own Prophet._)