Waiter's self looks sick At the very thought of it. Oh, remove it, quick! Customers want nought of it. Eh? One hungry sinner Asks another plateful? He should have his dinner Snatched by harpies fateful. Kitchen never yet Knew a failure greater. Few its end regret. Surely not the Waiter. He his finger had In the pie--or gravy. Did he? Well, 'tis sad. He must cry "_Peccavi!_" But whoever mixed, Or whoever boiled it, Our opinion's fixed, He, or they, quite spoiled it. 'Tis the general scoff, Butt of chaff and rudeness. Irish Stew is "Off", Finally--Thank Goodness! * * * * * REVISED VERSION. "IN GLOBO."--The author of Dixon's Johnsonary, who last week sent us a paragraph about the Globe Theatre (where, he said, it was pleasant to find the name of SHAKSPEARE once more associated with that of his great contemporary, JOHN BENSON), was wrong in saying that Miss DOROTHY DENE is taking the part of _Hippolyta_ in _The Midsummer Matinée's Dream_. It is very kind of so conscientious an _artiste_ to "take anybody's part." But, as a matter of fact, Miss DOROTHY is appearing as _Helena, La belle Hélène_, in the same drama. * * * * * "SPRING HATS FOR LADIES."--Are they going to adopt the _gibus_? * * * * * MORE TO FOLLOW. The dinner given by Mr. JAMES STAATS FORBES, Chairman of the L.C. & D. Railway, last Wednesday, to M. EIFFEL, and the French Engineers, was a big success. As the _P. M. G._, which, being now edited by a _chef_,--at least, he is a man-Cook,--authoritatively informed us, in anticipation of this feast, "The Continent and Great Britain have been ransacked for delicacies." There is to be another banquet, we hear, and more "ransacking." Once again will that delightfully-entertaining Chairman, J. S. FORBES, of the Lucullus Chatting and Dining Line, present a menu which will be unexampled in culinary history. By great favour we are permitted to present a few of the delights of this bill of fare, in which a SOYER would have rejoiced, a UDE have delighted, and of which a BRILLAT-SAVARIN might indeed have been proud. No expense in ransacking has been spared. They are sending to the prairie for prairie oysters; to Egypt for _Pot-au-feu (soupe à la mauvaise femme)_; to Jerusalem for artichokes, to Bath for chaps, and Brussels for sprouts. Bordeaux will be ransacked for pigeons, Scotland for Scotch woodcock, Wales for rabbits, Sardinia for sardines, and Turkey for rhubarb. Special messengers are travelling through Germany in search of sausages; others are in Ireland seeking supplies of the stew of that country. Bombay is being ransacked for its celebrated Bombay ducks, Guinea for fowls, Norfolk for dumplings, and Chili for vinegar. Merchant traders are already in treaty with Madeira for cakes; and while Naples is being