Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, July 17, 1841Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, July 17, 1841
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
It is true that there be able and eloquent writers greatly experienced in
this noble science, but none have yet been able so to express it as to
bring it (as we hope to have done) within the range of the certain
sciences. Henceforward, we trust it will form a part of the public
education, and not be subject tot he barbarous modes pursued by illogical
though earnest and zealous disciples; and that the great and glorious
Constitution that has done so much to bring it to perfection, will, in its
turn, be sustained and matured by the exercise of what is really in itself
so ancient and beautiful a practice.
VOTING MAY BE CONSIDERED AS
1st. He that hath NOT A VOTE AND VOTETH; which may be considered,
1st. As to his CLAIM, which is divisible into
1. He that voteth for dead men.
2. He that voteth for empty tenements.
3. He that voteth for many men.
4. He that voteth for men in the country, and the like.
2nd. As to his MOTIVE, which is divisible into
1. Because he hath a bet that he will vote.
2. Because he loveth a lark.
3. Because he LOVETH HIS COUNTRY.
[Here also may be applied all the predicates under the subjects
BRIBING, HUMBUG, and PRINCIPLE.]
2nd. He that hath A VOTE AND VOTETH NOT; which is divisible into
1st. He that is PREVENTED from voting, which is divisible into
1. He who is upset by a bribed coachman.
2. He who is incited into an assault, that he may be put
into the cage.
3. He who is driven by a drunken coachman many miles the wrong way.
4. He who is hocussed.
5. He who is sent into the country for a holiday, and the like.
2nd. He that FORFEITETH his vote, which is divisible into
1. He who is too great a philosopher to care for his country.
2. He who has not been solicited.
3. He who drinketh so that he cannot go to the poll.
4. He who is too drunk to speak at the poll.
5. He who through over-zeal getteth his head broken.
6. He who stayeth to finish the bottle, and is too late,
and the like.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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