"Hush! the curtain's up."--So it was; and "Bravo! bravo!" shouted the ladies, and "Hurrah!" shouted the gentlemen. Never had Mr. Hannibal Fitzflummery Fitzflam seen such wretched acting, or heard such enthusiastic applause. Round followed round, until, worked up to frenzy at the libel upon his name, and, as he thought, his art, he vociferously exclaimed, "Ladies and gentlemen, that man's a d--d impostor! ("Turn him out! throw him over! break his neck!" shouted the gods. "Shame shame!" called the boxes. "You're drunk," exclaimed the pit to a man.) I repeat that man is--("_Take that_!"--an apple in Fitzflam's eye.) I say he is another ("There it is!"--in his other eye) person altogether--a--("Boxkeeper!") Nothing of the sort; a--("Constable!") I'll take--("Take that fellow out!") Allow me to be--("Off! off!") I am--("'Out! out!") Let me request.--("Order! order!--hiss! hiss!--oh! oh!--ah! ah!--phit! phit!--Booh!--booh!--wooh!--oh!--ah!")" Here Mr. Fitzfunk came forward, and commenced bowing like a mandarin, while the gentleman who had blacked Fitzflam's eye desisted from forcing him out of the box, to hear the "great creature" speak. Fitzfunk commenced, "Ahem--Ladies and gentlemen, surrounded as I am by all sorts of--(Bravos from all parts of the house.) Friends! Friends in the boxes!--("Bravo!" from boxes, with violent waving of handkerchiefs.) Friends in the pit!--("Hurrah!" and sundry excited hats performing extraordinary aerial gyrations.) And last, not least in my dear love, friends in the gallery!--(Raptures of applause; five minutes' whistling; three chandeliers and two heads broken; and the owners of seventeen corns _stamped_ up to frenzy!) Need I fear the malice of an individual? ("Never! never!" from all parts of the house.) Could I deceive you, an enlightened public? ("No! no! impossible! all fudge!") Would I attempt such a thing? ("No! no! by no manner of means!") I am, ladies and gentlemen--("Fitzflam! Fitzflam!") I bow to your judgment. I have witnesses; shall I produce them?" "No," said two of his most enthusiastic supporters, scrambling out of the pit, and getting on the stage; "Don't trouble yourself; we know you; (_Omnes_. "Hurrah!" To Fitzflam in boxes--"Shame! shame!") _we_ will swear to you; (_Omnes_, " Fitzflam for ever!") and--we don't care who knows it--(_Omnes_. "Noble fellows!") we arrest you at the suit of Messrs. Moleskin and Corderoy, Regent's-quadrant, tailors. Attorneys, Messrs. Gallowsworthy and Pickles, of Furnival's Inn. Plaintiff claims 54l. debt and 65l. costs; so come along, will you!"