Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, October 9, 1841 — John Shaqi
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, October 9, 1841Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, October 9, 1841
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
What would have followed, it is impossible to say; but at this moment Mr.
Adolphus Casay's bail was accepted, he being duly bound down, in the sum
of twenty pounds, to produce Mr. Brown Bunkem at the magistrate's office
by eleven o'clock of the following forenoon. This being settled, in spite
of a vigorous opposition, with the assistance of five half-crowns, four
policemen, the driver of, and hackney-coach No. 3141, Mr. Brown Bunkem was
conveyed to his own proper lodgings, and there left, with one boot and a
splitting headache, to do duty for a counterpane, he vehemently opposing
every attempt to make him a deposit between the sheets.--Seven o'clock on
the following morning found Mr. Adolphus Casay at the bedside of the
violently-snoring and stupidly obfuscated Brown Bunkem. In vain he
pinched, shook, shouted, and swore; inarticulate grunts and apoplectic
denunciations against the disturber of his rest were the only answers to
his urgent appeals as to the necessity of Mr. Brown Bunkem's getting ready
to appear before the magistrate. Visions of contempt of court, forfeited
bail, and consequent disbursements, flitted before the mind of the
agitated Mr. Adolphus Casay. Ten o'clock came; Bunken seemed to snore the
louder and sleep the sounder. What was to be done? why, nothing but to get
up an impromptu influenza, and try his rhetoric on the presiding
magistrates of the bench.
Influenced by this determination, Mr. Adolphus Casay started for that den
of thieves and magistrates in the neighbourhood of Bow-street; but Mr.
Adolphus Casay's feelings were anything but enviable; though by no means a
straitlaced man, he had an instinctive abhorrence of anything that
appeared a blackguard transaction. Nothing but a kind wish to serve a
friend would have induced him to appear within a mile of such a wretched
place; but the thing was now unavoidable, so he put the best face he could
on the matter, made his way to the clerk of the Court, and there, in a low
whisper, began his explanation, that being "how Mr. Brown Bunkem"--at this
moment the crier shouted--
"Bunkem! Where's Bunkem?"
"I am here!" said Mr. Adolphus Casay; "here to"--
"Step inside, Bunkem," shouted a sturdy auxiliary; and with considerable
manual exertion and remarkable agility, he gave the unfortunate Adolphus a
peculiar twist that at once deposited him behind the bar and before the
bench.
"I beg to state," commenced the agitated and innocent Adolphus.
"Silence, prisoner!" roared the crier.
"Will you allow me to say,"--again commenced Adolphus--
"Hold your tongue!" vociferated P74.
"I must and will be heard."
"Young man," said the magistrate, laying down the paper, "you are doing
yourself no good; be quiet. Clerk, read the charge."
After some piano mumbling, the words
"drunk--abusive--disorderly--incapable--taking care of
self--stretcher--station-house--bail," were shouted out in the most
fortissimo manner.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account