superior to anything of the kind previously attempted!" (_As he pauses fur breath, you will take occasion to observe, that no doubt such a work, as he contemplates, will be an excellent thing--but that, for your own part, you can dispense with any information respecting the Notabilities of Norwood, and, in short, that if he will excuse you_--) "Pardon me, Mr. LANE," he interrupts, "you mistake my object. I should not dream of expecting you to _subscribe_ to such a work. But, in my capacity of compiler, I naturally desire to leave nothing undone that care and research can effect to render the work complete--and it would be incomplete indeed, were it to include no reference to so distinguished a resident as yourself!" ("_Oh, pooh--nonsense!" You will say at this--but you will sit down again_) "Norwood is a singularly favoured locality. Sir; its charms have induced many of our foremost men to select it for their _rus in urbe_. Why, in this very road--May I ask, by the way, if you are acquainted with Alderman MINCING? Alderman MINCING has been good enough to furnish me with many interesting details of his personal career, a photo-gravured portrait of him will be included, with views of the interior and exterior of 'The Drudgeries,' and a bit from the back-garden." (_You do know_ MINCING--_and you cannot help inwardly wondering at the absurd vanity of the man_--_a mere nobody, away from the City!_) "Between ourselves," says your interviewer, candidly, having possibly observed your expression, "I am by no means sure that I shall feel warranted in allotting Alderman MINCING as much space as I fear he will consider himself entitled to. Alderman MINCING, though a highly respectable man, does _not_ appeal to the popular imagination as others I could mention do--he is just a _little_ commonplace!" ("_Shrewd follow, this!" you think to yourself--"Got_ MINCING's _measure!_") "But I should feel it an honour, indeed, if such a man as yourself, now, would give me all the personal information you think proper to make public, while, as a specimen of what Norwood can do in luxurious and artistic domestic fittings, this house, Sir, would be invaluable! I do trust that you will see your way to--" (_At first, you suggest that you must talk it over with your Wife--but you presently see that if_ MINCING _and men of that calibre are to be in this, you cannot, for your own sake, hold aloof, and so your Visitor soon has his note-book out._) "Any remarkable traits recorded of you as an infant, Mr. LANE? A strong aversion to porridge, and an antipathy to black-beetles--both of which you still retain? Thank you, _very_ much. And you were educated? At Dulborough Grammar School? Just _so_! Never took to Latin, or learned Greek? Commercial aptitudes declaring themselves thus early--curious, _indeed_! Entered your father's office as clerk? Became a partner? Married your present lady--when? In 1860? Exactly!--and have offspring? Your subsequent life comparatively