_Second W. I. M._ _What!_ you don't know what the Bland Bill was? Don't you remember it? It provided that a certain amount of silver was to be coined every year, and the Treasury was to hold the surplus until it reached a certain value, and then,--but every schoolboy knows what happened. _Average Man._ What did happen, as a matter of fact? _Second W. I. M._ (_scornfully_). Why, the market was flooded. _First W. I. M._ Yes, and that exactly proves my point. Make fifteen the ratio between gold and silver, and you'll never have the market flooded again. _Second W. I. M._ (_hotly_). How do you make that out? _First W. I. M._ It's as plain as a pikestaff. Make silver your legal tender for large amounts in this country, and you stop all these United States games at one blow. _Second W. I. M._ Fiddlesticks! I suppose you'll want us to believe next that if we become bi-metallists, corn and everything else will go up in value? _First W. I. M._ Of course it will. We've only got to get Germany and France, and the rest of them to come in, and the thing's as good as done. What I say is, adopt bi-metallism, and you relieve trade and agriculture, and everything else. _A. M._ Do you mean we shall have to pay more for everything? _First W. I. M._ No, of course not; I mean that the appreciation of gold is a calamity which we've got to get rid of. _A. M._ I don't see it. If my sovereign buys more than it did years ago, that seems to be a bit of a catch for me, don't it? _First W. I. M._ Ah, I daresay you think so, but you're wrong. If you fix a ratio, things may be dearer, but you'll have twice as much purchasing power. _Inquirer_ (_anxiously_). How do you fix a ratio? _Second W. I. M._ Ah, that's the question! _First W. I. M._ That's not my business. I say it ought to be fixed, and it's for the Chancellor of the Exchequer and the Bank of England to do it. _Second W. I. M._ (_decisively_). The Bank can't do it. Its Charter won't allow it. _Inquirer._ How's that? I never quite understood the Charter. _Second W. I. M._ By the Charter the Bank has to---- [_But at this moment, the train having drawn up at a station, an intruder gets into the carriage. He is severely frowned upon, and the conversation, thus checked, is not resumed._ _Inquirer_ (_getting out at terminus, to_ First W. I. M.). I think I've got a pretty clear notion of Bi-metallism now, thanks to you. _First W. I. M._ (_modestly_). Oh, it's quite simple, if you only take the trouble to give your mind to it. * * * * * [Illustration: A Little Mixed.] * * * * * _OUR_ "MISSING WORD COMPETITION." _Guaranteed exempt from any Treasury prosecution under 1st Jingo, B. IV. Cap_ (_Fit_) 1, _sec_ (_Pommery_) '74. (_Heading, "Wish you may get it."_) MR. PUNCH DESIRES TO CONVEY TO ALL, URBI ET ORBI, HIS VERY KINDEST ....... AND BEST....... FOR THE COMING CHRISTMAS, 1892.