"And yet I was certainly told that the sun of England had set never to rise again," persisted the Aboriginal, who seemed to be of an obstinate turn of mind. "Now I remember--the cause was something to do with Diamonds and Henley. Stay, the bright brains of the nation had disappeared. I recollect, the Diamond Sculls of the nation (once so great) had passed to foreigners." "Ah, now I take your meaning." said the National Representative, with a smile, "and you must have heard of the result of the race for the Diamond Sculls at Henley." "That must be it," acquiesced the New-Zealander. "I had forgotten to take into account possible errors in transmission. But tell me, has there been a national defeat?" "Well, yes," admitted _Mr. Punch_, with a sigh--"we did not come out altogether satisfactorily. Even the second man was a Frenchman--albeit, his name was suggestive of dear old Scotland." "And do you mean to say," said the New-Zealander, "that the best scullers of England were beaten by a boating-man from the Seine?" "It is too true, and the Frenchman himself succumbed to a Dutchman--yes, we confess it, and with shame." "I don't see why you should," returned the other, changing his tone to one of greater satisfaction. "As a New-Zealander, I observe nothing degrading in the superiority of Old Holland." And considering the prowess of VAN TROMP in the past, there was perhaps nothing so strange in the triumph of OOMS in the present. * * * * * "TO PAY OR NOT TO PAY, THAT IS THE BISLEYNESS." MY DEAR MR. PUNCH,--I see that the receipts of the National Rifle Association have fallen off, and that there is a proposal to make the Bisley Meeting this year rather more attractive than its predecessors. The Camp is to be open, and there are to be Concerts and other distractions. But is this enough? Once confess that Rifle-shooting is not the sole business of the gathering, and the way is cleared for more amusing items. All that is wanted to convert a semi-failure into a triumphant success, is a Manager who could combine entertainment with instruction, thus:-- 6 A.M.--Gun-fire. The Camp awakes, and, to the music of the band, gets up. Reserved seats in band-enclosure, sixpence extra. 7 A.M.--Balloon Ascent. Firing at the sun with revolvers by trained aeronauts. Seats in parachutes, five shillings a-piece. 8 A.M.--Early performance of BUFFALO BILL before his departure for Earl's Court. Prices as usual. 9 A.M.--Sham Fight, augmented by Menagerie from Travelling Circus. Cards to visit the stables, half-a-crown. 10 A.M.--Representation of Siege Scene from Venice in London, under the title of "The Bridge of Sighs within measuring distance of Woking Cemetery." Season tickets, half-a-guinea. 11 A.M.--Performance of the Battle of Waterloo by veterans, late of Astley's Theatre. Families and schools half-price. 12 NOON.--Visit of Royalty, and Presentation of Purses. No Purse accepted containing less than two pounds ten.