_Local Preacher_ (_giving an account to the Vicar of the Parish of a dispute he has had with the Leading Lights of his Sect_). "YES, SIR, AFTER TREATMENT THE LIKES O' THAT, I SAYS TO 'EM, 'FOR THE FUTURE,' SAYS I, 'I CHUCKS UP ALL RELIGION, AND I GOES TO CHURCH!'"] * * * * * A HINT TO EDITORS. SCENE--_The Sanctum of a Newspaper Office. Editor discovered (by Obtrusive Visitor) hard at work._ _Obtrusive Visitor_. I trust that I have not come at an unfortunate moment? _Editor_ (_looking up from his desk_). Dear me! You here! Delighted to see you. But don't let me disturb you. Good-bye! _Ob. Vis._ (_seating himself_). No; I am afraid it is the other way. I know at this time of the week you must be exceptionally busy. _Ed._ (_with courteous impatience_). Not at all, but-- _Ob. Vis._ Oh! thank you so much. Because it is the very last thing in the world I would like to do--to disturb you. And now, how are you? _Ed._ Quite well, thanks. But now, if you don't mind, I will just finish. [_Turns to go on with his article._ _Ob. Vis._ (_rejecting the hint_). I said to myself as I came along, Now I will look him up. _Ed._ Very kind of you, but-- _Ob. Vis._ Oh, not in the least; and you know, my dear fellow, how I enjoy a chat. _Ed._ Yes,--and I, too. But just now-- _Ob. Vis._ Quite so. You want me to do all the talking, as we haven't met for the last three weeks. Well, you must know we have been to Herne Bay, and-- _Ed._ Yes; charming place. But just now I am-- _Ob. Vis._ Quite so. But I didn't come to tell you about Herne Bay, although it is really a delightful spot. The air-- _Ed._ Yes, I know all about it. First-rate, most salubrious, and the rest of it. But, my dear friend, you really must-- _Ob. Vis._ Quite so! Yes, everyone knows all about Herne Bay; and I really came to ask you if you had any room for an article. _Ed._ (_roused_). My dear fellow, I assure you we are quite full for months. Any number of excellent things standing over. _Ob. Vis._ Oh, yes, I know you are always full. You told me so the last time I called. _Ed._ Quite so! Very sorry, but it can't be helped. Have to look so far ahead nowadays, you know. _Ob. Vis._ Certainly; and that is why I thought I would just bring a half-finished article and show you what I had dome, and complete it if you thought it would do. You can put it in whenever you like; so it would not hurt for standing over. _Ed._ (_with inspiration_). What is it called? _Ob. Vis._ "Russian Wheat and Chinese Tea or Free Trade in Australia." The subject is quite novel, and ought to attract considerable attention. _Ed._ Novel! Why, my dear fellow, I do believe I have an article somewhere in that heap upon the very subject. [_Pretends to search pile of MS._ _Ob. Vis._ (_uneasily_). Oh, never mind. I will read you what I have written, and--