"Here we have the best conceivable endorsement of my views. That which in the excitement of the fray they were impotent to achieve, this, with fitting leisure, unhampered by the annoyance of hostile opposition, and with the object rigidly fixed, as in a vice, they effected with unqualified and unquestioned success." Dazzled by my reflections he proceeded to put a fresh conundrum to me. "What say you," he asked, "to the resources of China? I see that the Dowager Empress has sent three millions of taels to the forces." "The tael," I explained, "is excellent eating. I perceive no immediate reason for the evacuation of Peking as far as the supply of game is concerned. This, however, is a side issue, and not strictly nautical in its bearing. "To proceed at once, and in conclusion, to the matter of our own naval supremacy" (for I saw this inevitable question already framed on his lips), "I will give you in a word the accumulated wisdom of long years of naval intuition. My motto is '_Always win!_' "Once let the enemy, however inferior, win, and for the time being you are beaten. We are--and here I rely not only on my own observation, but on the testimony of countless myriads of my species--_we are an insular nation_. Further, _our commerce is largely dependent on our merchandise_. It was not till I had realised to the full these two momentous and crucial facts that I arrived at the conclusion which I have already imparted to you, and now venture to repeat--'_Always win!_' You bear me out, I imagine?" "I bear myself," he affably replied; thus concluding an interview in the course of which there had been no manner of hitch except the usual nautical one at the moment of his coming aboard; and that was due not to the absence of braces, but to respect for my position as an Admiralty Crichton. There, _Mr. Punch_, you are welcome to make any use you will of a statement that contains practically and tactically the final word on the future of naval warfare. _Crede_, dear Sir, Yours unusually EXPERTO. * * * * * A NEW DEPARTURE. In pursuance of a recent correspondence in the _Times_, it has been decided to safeguard the rights and legalise the _status_ of interviewees by the formation of an influential association. _Mr. Punch_ has been accorded an advance proof of the prospectus. SOCIETY FOR THE PROTECTION OF HELPLESS AND DESERVING INTERVIEWEES. (_Founded Oct. 24, 1894._) Chief Offices: Utopia. Operating Room and Infirmary: Harrow Weald. [Illustration] COUNCIL. The MIKADO (President); Sir JOSEPH PORTER, K. C. B. (Vice-President); BARNABY BAMPTON BOO, Esq., of the _Bab Ballads_; BORRIA BUNGALEE BOO, ditto, King; Mrs. BOO; REGINALD BUNTHORNE, Esq., Fleshly Poet; The Lord Bishop of RUMTI-FOO; Sir EDWARD CORCORAN, K.C.B., Capt. R.N.; Lord MOUNT ARARAT; Lord TOLLOLLER; POOH BAH, Esq., of the Japan Society; Mdlles. PEEP-BO, PITTI SING, and YUMYUM, of the Savoy Theatre.