Because he has not eulogized The operas of RICHARD STRAUSS, Or liberally recognized KEIR HARDIE'S courage in the House; Because he's more an errant knight Than Pacifist or Chauvinist-- I feel it is not fair or right To put him in the Honour List. Because he has not wreathed with bays The brow of good Sir WILLIAM BYLES Or lavished undiluted praise Upon the food of EUSTACE MILES; Or urged that we should subsidize The cult of the Theosophist-- It fills me with a sick surprise To find him in the Honour List. Because he hasn't written odes In praise of NORMAN ANGELL'S views, Or aped the fashionable modes Which modern versifiers use; Because he writes with much restraint And is, in style, a Classicist-- It very nearly makes me faint To see him in the Honour List. In fine, while MASTERMAN--O Fi For ASQUITH'S everlasting shame!-- MACDONALD, CADBURY and I Have each no handle to his name; While HANDEL BOOTH'S well-earned O.M. Is still conspicuously missed-- I can't sufficiently condemn The framing of the Honour List. * * * * * Irony in the Tube. After all the efforts and good nature sometimes exercised in getting on to the right platform in a Tube station, it is quite nice to be faced by the following bold announcement-- "THE BEST WAY TO SEE LONDON IS FROM THE TOP OF A 'BUS." Each word that follows is a stab at your heated and gross imbecility:-- "YOU ENJOY FRESH AIR. YOU SEE THE LIFE OF THE TREES. YOU PASS EVERY PLACE OF INTEREST." Possibly the Tube will take its revenge and post the following advertisement on the buses:-- "ONLY IDIOTS TRAVEL BY 'BUS. THE TUBE IS FAR, FAR THE BETTER METHOD OF TRANSIT." * * * Private----writes from the Front:-- "Dear Mother, I expected when I come to France to hear the pheasants shouting the mayonnaise, but you dont." * * * "Reinforcements subsequently arrived, and a squadron of dragons then courageously attacked the enemy."--_Westminster Gazette._ Thus heaping coals of fire on the head of poor ST. GEORGE. * * * * * MY EWE LION. I must confess that I was finding it rather galling to have no friends at all at the Front. Everyone else was so well furnished with these acquaintances, often actually relations. But I had no one I knew, although gradually one by one my clerks joined KITCHENER'S Army and passed to various training grounds, returning (in my opinion far too often) to the office in their uniforms to disturb the routine and waste the time of the others. Some drilling and instruction I am assured go on in these camps, but I see in London every day sufficient English soldiers to drive twice the present number of Germans out of Belgium--if they really meant it.