"DEAR BRITISH COMMANDER OF INFLUENCE,--I am with cordial gratitude to put this pen before you, saying since I came down from my native land I had been trie for a house, even by rentable, but none for me in that village, where I lieve still. But a certain friend of mine do advice me to stay with him, during the last December up to now. And yet that young man's wife has come from his native land, with these there is no room before me at all. Therefore I wish with my lowly voice to beg your honour to find me even a half house of your kitchen at any place where you like, or either the same place where I am. By your own desire. Please Sir if not! try and get me a boards such as a glass packing cases and a few planks for poles. But Sir I know myself very well, that it will be very difficulty before you, simple because you have none of carpenters. Therefore do try by your own authority to supply me those boards and planks, and I shall find myself a joiner as a day contract to build it for me! because my elder brother also shall help. Therefore dear Lord I hope you shall give ear for my lowly speak and then have mercy on your meekly servant with good reply. I have the most honour to be Sir "Your humble Clerk." * * * * * FOR "INELIGIBLES" ONLY. "WANTED, Bricklayers for pointing 12 houses at Belvedere; peacework."--_Provincial Paper._ * * * * * COMMERCIAL MODESTY. "M. JACOB & CO., CONFECTIONER AND GLACIER. Pastry of sorts." _Madras Mail._ * * * * * THE ZEAL OF THE CONVERT. Sir THOMAS WHITTAKER, M.P., as reported by _The Yorkshire Evening Post_: "Objection to compulsion on principle was all nonsense. Compulsion was the only safe-guard we had against anarchy, barbarism, law, order, justice, and freedom." * * * * * CROMWELLIANA. "On Friday last a centenarian passed away at Whithall, Galway, in the person of Mrs. Catherine Hynes, who had attained the remarkable age of 102. The old lady had a remarkably retentive memory, recalling with ease incidents which occurred three generations ago. Her recollection of Cromwell's campaign was particularly clear."--_Connacht Tribune._ "The other alien peer is the twelfth Viscount Taaffe, of the Irish peerage, an Austrian subject, as his predecessors have been since their estates were confiscated by Cromwell after the Battle of the Boyne."--_Sunday Times._ The late Mrs. HYNES was perhaps the authority for this statement. * * * * * "ALLIES' WARSHIPS KEEP TURKS ON TENDER HOOKS AT GALLIPOLI."--_Express and Echo (Exeter)._ This is rather hard on the enemy, who thought the Allies had taken their hook long ago. * * * * * AT THE FRONT.