Briefly stated, it is that during his hermit existence at Putney the late Mr. SWINBURNE effected an interchange of this sort with Sir W. ROBERTSON NICOLL; the Editor of _The British Weekly_ devoting himself to the composition of poems, while the poet assumed editorial control of the famous newspaper. If the theory thus crudely stated sounds somewhat fantastic the arguments on which it is based are extraordinarily plausible if not convincing. * * * * * To begin with, experts in anagrams will not fail to notice that the names ALGERNON SWINBURNE and W. ROBERTSON NICOLL contain practically the same number of letters--absolutely the same if SWINBURNE is spelt without an "e"--and that the forenames of both end in "-on," as does also the concluding syllable of WATTS-DUNTON. The fact that the Editor of _The British Weekly_ has never published any poems over his own name only tends to confirm the theory, as the argument conclusively establishes. * * * * * For it is impossible to believe that so versatile a polymath should not at some time or other have courted the Muse, and if so, under what name could he have had a stronger motive for publishing his poems than that of SWINBURNE? So austere a theologian would naturally shrink from revealing his excursions into the realms of poesy, and under this disguise he was safe from detection. Lastly, while Sir W. ROBERTSON NICOLL has always championed the Kailyard School, SWINBURNE lived at The Pines. The connection is obvious; as thus: Kail, sea-kale, sea-coal, coke, coker-nut, walnut, dessert, pine-apple, pine. * * * * * As regards SWINBURNE'S conduct of _The British Weekly_, it is enough to point to such alliterative and melodious combinations as "Rambling Remarks" and "Claudius Clear." The theological attitude of the paper presents difficulties which are not so easy to overcome, but Mr. Pullar Leggatt has promised to deal with this question later on. Meanwhile the diplomatic silence maintained by Sir W. ROBERTSON NICOLL and Mr. EDMUND GOSSE must not be interpreted as conveying either a complete acceptance or a total rejection of this remarkable theory. * * * * * [Illustration: _Wounded Tommy_. "WILL YOU PLAY MENDELSSOHN'S 'SPRING SONG,' PLEASE?" _Distinguished Pianist_ (_with a soul above Mendelssohn_). "I'M AFRAID I CAN'T." _Tommy_. "IT IS A BIT OF A TEASER, AIN'T IT? TIES MY SISTER UP IN A KNOT WHENEVER SHE TACKLES IT."] * * * * * THE NEW CRUMMLES. HERTLING "is not Prussian." * * * * * MY PYJAMAS. A STUDY IN THE FASTIDIOUS.