"There isn't," said the inventor. "Nothing ever has been done or will be done that can prevent theatrical managers from copying each other. It's chronic. But you'll be the first, remember that; and the pioneer often has some credit. You'll get the start, and that means a lot. For some months, at any rate, it will be your theatre to which the snobs will crowd." Such was the interview. What the manager will decide cannot yet be stated, for the week has not expired. * * * * * [Illustration: _First Mite_. "AIN'T 'E JUST LIKE THE PICTURES, LIZ? I BETCHER 'E'S A COWBOY." _Second ditto_. "GARN! 'E'S ONLY A SOLDIER."] * * * * * [Illustration: HUMOURS OF A REMOUNT CAMP. _Staff Officer_. "I RODE THIS HORSE YOU SENT ME ON TUESDAY AND HE WAS ALL RIGHT. BUT WHEN I RODE HIM ON WEDNESDAY HE WAS MUCH TOO FRISKY." _Remount Officer_. "WELL, WHY NOT RIDE HIM ONLY ON TUESDAYS?"] * * * * * "GOOSE.--Remembrance and many thanks for war dividends."--_Daily Telegraph_. This is the best it can do under present conditions. Golden eggs are "off." * * * * * "It was Tennyson who told us that there are 'books in running brooks and sermons in stones.'" But it was SHAKSPEARE who said it first. * * * * * LINES ON A NEW HISTORY. Weary of MACAULAY, never nodding, Weary of the stodginess of STUBBS, Weary of the scientific plodding Of the school that only digs and grubs; I salute, with grateful admiration Foreign to the hireling eulogist, CHESTERTON'S red-hot self-revelation In the guise of England's annalist. Here is no parade of erudition, No pretence of calm judicial tone, But the stimulating ebullition Of a sort of humanized cyclone; Unafraid of flagrant paradoxes, Unashamed of often seeing red, Here's a thinker who the compass boxes Standing most at ease upon his head. Yet with all this acrobatic frolic There's a core of sanity behind Madness that is never melancholic, Passion never cruel or unkind; And, although his wealth of purple patches Some precisians may excessive deem, Still the decoration always matches Something rich and splendid in the theme. Not a text-book--that may admitted-- Full of dates and Treaties and of Pacts, For our author cannot be acquitted Of a liberal handling of his facts; But a stirring proof of Britain's title, Less in Empire than in soul, of "Great," And a frank and generous recital Of "the glories of our blood and State." * * * * * JOURNALISTIC CANDOUR. "Mrs. ----, to her latest days, was a devoted student of the 'Recorder.' Her end came through continuous 'eye strain' in reading the Conference news for several hours together."--_Methodist Recorder_. * * * * *