"Your Government, solicitous as always for your welfare, has during the past two years accumulated a vast store of nutritious mutton to safeguard you against the peril of starvation. That danger being happily averted, it is now up to you to eat the stuff. This is not a problem that can be tackled by half-measures. If you desire to preserve the financial stability of the Empire, and if you do not wish to go on eating antiquated corpses of Australasian sheep for the rest of your lives, you must set your teeth in grim earnest, eating against time and chewing over time. You must consume mutton for breakfast, mutton for luncheon, mutton for tea and mutton for dinner. In fact, each one of you must in the interests of the State become a mutton glutton. "Do you shrink from the task? Do you shirk the chop now that you know what is at stake? An army marches on its stomach; the nation's well-being hangs on yours. Henceforth, until the 'Cease Fire' sounds, you must fall upon the domestic enemy as our gallant soldiers fell upon the alien foe. No quarter must be given, no quarter, fore or hind, be permitted to escape. Beef must be banned and veal avoided as the plague; no Briton worthy of the name will claim a fowl. "What are you going to do about it? Do you intend (to borrow a Trans-atlantic phrase) to give the frozen mitt to the frozen mutt? Or are you going to take it to your bosom and give it there, or thereabouts, the home for which it has so long been vainly seeking? "Do it now and do it always. Let your daily motto be--'_Revenons a nos moutons_.'" In addition to the foregoing, every British housewife is to be supplied with a valuable booklet containing a number of official recipes for dealing with mutton. Among the tasty dishes thus described may be mentioned Whitehall Hash, Ministerial Mince, Reconstruction Rissoles, Control Cutlets and Separation Stew. Mr. Punch also learns that in honour of the campaign the Yeomen of the Guard are henceforth to be popularly known as the "Muttoneaters." * * * * * WHAT OF THE DUMPS? ["We repeat our question, therefore, and expect a 'Yes' or 'No' answer: _Have all the dumps been sold, or have they not_?"--_Daily Mail_.] While wealth untold lies heaped in idleness We will not see the nation go to pot; We ask you (kindly answer "No" or "Yes"): _Have all the dumps been sold, or have they not_? By many a shell-torn desolate chateau Stand monumental piles of martial store Reared up long since to stem a savage foe By labours of the Army Service Corps; And day by day, in spite of our advice, They linger wastefully to rust and rot; We ask (and let your answer be concise): _Have all the dumps been sold, or have they not_? No more may KELLAWAY in bland retort Disguise the truth with verbal circumstance; Our special correspondents still report: "Entrenching tools obscure the face of France.".