Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 93, December 3, 1887 — John Shaqi
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 93, December 3, 1887Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 93, December 3, 1887
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
"Look here, you fellows," he said, "I've got a good thing on here, that,
I fancy, will be more worth your attention than even the latest prices."
He pulled a prospectus from his pocket. An interested crowd closed round
him at once. "It's 'Old Mother +Noggins+, Limited,'" he went on, reading
from the paper before him, "This Company has been started for the
purpose of acquiring at wholesale prices all the tarts, bull's-eyes,
apples, toffy, and ginger-beer, forming the present stock-in-trade of
Old Mother +Noggins's+ store, and for retailing the same at a figure,
that will, after paying the guaranteed interest on the fourpenny
debenture shares, admit of the declaration of a dividend of 14 per cent.
on the ordinary paid-up share capital of the Company.
A buzz of excited admiration went up from the throng. The Fourth Form at
St. Dunstan's had not for a long time had such a good thing put before
it.
"I know," continued +Tom+, producing a bundle of forms of application
from his pocket, "that you fellows, would like to hear of it. Who'll go
for it?"
There was a loud responsive shout of "I!" and a dozen hands were at once
stretched towards the speaker. Business commenced, and sixpences,
shillings, and half-crowns were pouring into +Tom's+ pockets faster than
he could cram them there. He was making a very good morning's work of
it. Presently, a dull, heavy-looking boy joined the group.
"Hullo, +Flopper+!" cried +Tom+, addressing this last arrival, "why
don't you put that ten bob your Uncle sent you into this thing? I'll be
bound he told you to turn it over. You won't get such a chance every
day."
"What is it?" asked +Flopper+.
A chorus of voices instantly joined in a brief explanation of the
advantages of investing in "Old Mother +Noggins'+ Limited."
"By Jove!" said +Flopper+, "I don't know that I won't."
"Not if I know it," cried an authoritative voice, breaking in upon the
scene. It was +Snagsby+, the "Sharper" who spoke. There was a general
look in his direction, and a disposition to make way for him as he
approached. He had been mixed up disadvantageously in a recent "corner"
in marbles, and had from time to time floated several concerns that had
never paid any dividends, and was generally regarded as a "queer"
customer in consequence. It was for this reason that he had been
nicknamed the "Sharper."
"And what do you want him to do with his money?" asked +Tom+, stepping
forward in a defiant attitude.
"He'll put every blessed halfpenny of it into my 'General Pen-knife
Supply,'" was the laconic reply. "He signed for the allotment last
night."
"But I've changed my mind," pleaded +Flopper+, helplessly, and he handed
the half-sovereign to +Tom+.
"You give that up!" cried the Sharper, menacingly.
"You try to take it!" replied +Tom+, grimly.
In another instant the Sharper had flown at +Tom+. There was a brief
struggle. +Tom+ hit out at him, and caught him in the face.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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