_C. B._ But don't take liberties, my lad. No jumps In for a drive; they're always on the stumps. And then their wicket-keeper's like a cat. _L. B._ Well, anyhow _you_ carried out your bat, Despite the lot of them. Can "_crack_" do more? _C. B. (significantly)._ Yes!--I kept up my stumps, but _could not score_! A "Not out, nothing" may be meritorious, And very useful, but 'tis hardly glorious, A stolid SCOTTON'S worth his salt, at need; But, after all, he's not a GRACE or READ. _You_'ll have to hit, as well as guard your wicket, If you'd be popular. Blocking is not Cricket! _L. B._ Humph! no, not quite. My orders are to score And bring the House down. _C. B._ That will cause a roar When you take back your bat to the Pavilion. A Cricketer must smite to please the Million. * * * * * ROUTLEDGE'S _Jubilee Guide to London_, is good, not only for such a "high old time" as the Jubilee Week, but for the next three years or so until the streets are re-named and a few new thoroughfares opened up. The illustrations are excellent. There is only one objection to this Guide as a companion, and that is it is rather too large. No Guide to be useful should be bigger than the Handy-Volume Shakspeare size, originally started at 85, Fleet Street. Some of the French Guides, not the regiment, but the little books, JOANNE'S Series, are models in this respect. * * * * * PHILIPS' _Handy Volume Atlas_ is about the right size. "The World," it is often said, "is a small place;" but for all that, it does not go so easily in a tail-coat pocket, where Mr. PHILIPS' _Atlas_ can be conveniently carried. It is an invaluable companion for everyday newspaper reading. _Happy Thought_ for Travellers, to whom this little volume is recommended, "PHILIPS on his way through the World." * * * * * [Illustration: WHAT OUR ARTIST HAS TO PUT UP WITH. _Our Artist (showing his last and most important Picture, the work of years)._ "YES, I SHOULD LIKE TO _EXHIBIT_ IT; BUT I DON'T WANT TO _SELL_ IT, YOU KNOW--AT LEAST NOT TILL TIMES ARE BETTER." _Friend._ "WELL, WHY NOT SEND IT TO THE EXHIBITION, AND PUT A PROHIBITIVE PRICE UPON IT--SAY TWENTY POUNDS?!"] * * * * * TOO MUCH OF A GOOD THING. (_Meteorological forecast for the Month._) _6th._--Queen's Weather continues. Raspberry crop fails. Strawberries sold by auction in Covent Garden Market, and fetch two guineas each. _13th._--Queen's Weather still continues. All the grass in Hyde Park turns brown, and suddenly disappears. Vegetables generally sell at famine prices. Riot of Dukes attempting to secure a bundle of late asparagus from a fashionable West End greengrocer's, suppressed by the police.