_Elfie._ It is wrong to hate one's Grandmother, whatever she does. At first, when I heard, I was very, very sorry. I _did_ think it was most unkind of you. But now, oh, I _can't_ believe that you had not some good, wise motive, in acting as you did! _Lady B._ (_in conscience-stricken aside_). Even _this_ cannot shatter her artless faith ... Oh, wretch, wretch! [_Covers her face._ _Monks._ Motive--I believe you there, Missie. Why, she went and insured all their lives aforehand, _she_ did. _Lady B._ MONKSHOOD, in pity hold your peace! _Elfie_ (_her face beaming_). I knew it--I was sure of it! Oh, Granny, my dear, kind old Granny, you insured their lives first, so that no real harm could possibly happen to them--oh, I am so happy! _Lady B._ (_aside_). What shall I say? Merciful Powers, what _shall_ I say to her? [_Disturbed sounds without._ _Monks._ I don't know what you'd better _say_, but I can tell you what your Ladyship had better _do_--and that is, take your 'ook while you can. Even now the outraged populace approaches, to wreak a hawful vengeance upon your guilty 'ed! [_Melodramatic music._ _Lady B._ (_distractedly_). A mob! I cannot face them--they will tear me limb from limb. At my age I could not survive such an indignity as that! Hide me, MONKSHOOD--help me to escape! _Monks._ There is a secret underground passage, known only to myself, communicating with the nearest railway station. I will point it out, and personally conduct your Ladyship--for a consideration--one thousand pounds down. [_The noise increases._ _Elfie._ No, Grannie, don't trust him! Be calm and brave. Await the mob here. Leave it all to me. I will explain everything to them--how you meant no ill,--how, at the very time they thought you were meditating an injury, you were actually spending money in insuring all their lives. When I tell them _that_---- _Monks._ Ah, you tell 'em that, and see. It's too late now--they are here. [_Shouts without. Lady B. crouches on floor. Little_ ELFIE _goes to the window, throws open the shutters, and stands on balcony in her fluttering white robe, and the limelight._ _Elfie._ Yes, they are here. Why, they are carrying torches!--(Lady B. _groans_)--and banners, too! I think they have a band ... Who is that tall, stout gentleman, in the white hat, on horseback, and the lady in a pony-trap, with, oh, such a beautiful complexion! There is an inscription on one of the flags--I can read it quite plainly. "_Thanks to the generous Donor!_" (That must be _you_, Grandmother!) And there are children who dance, and scatter flowers. They are asking for a speech. (_Speaking off._) "If you please, Ladies and Gentlemen, my Grandmamma is not at all well, but she wishes me to say she wishes you a Merry Christmas, and is very glad you all like your presents so much. Good-bye, _good_-bye! (_Returning down Stage._) Now they have gone away, Granny ... They did look so grateful!