One Word of Caution, and I conclude Circular 1059. BE VERY CAUTIOUS OF SOME PEOPLE I KNOW. Once trust yourself to them, and it is all U.P.--Wire immediately (_and send the necessary cover_) to Yours truly, ZACH. SPYDUR. P.S.--When once you have tasted the joys of speculation, you will think and care for nothing else. The click of the Tape Machine is music to you. I have one going all night in my bed-room. * * * * * SUGGESTION FOR ADVERTISEMENT OF ST. JAMES'S THEATRE.--"_As You Like It_",--come and see it! * * * * * [Illustration: MADAME DIOGENES.] _Diogenes._ What are these better possessions you speak of? _Krates._ Wisdom, self-sufficiency, truth, plain-speaking, freedom. LUCIAN'S _Dialogues of the Dead_. Ah! Madame La France, after trials all round Of great Chiefs and their squabbling political progenies, Like him of Sinope, at last you are found With lantern in hand, a true Lady Diogenes. The precinct is dark, and seems growing still dimmer, Your wandering light shows a devious glimmer. A right Honest Man? He was scarce in the Courts. He seems very nearly as scarce in the Caucuses. You've had leaders of late of all sizes and sorts, And the gloom of the outlook is utter as Orcus's. Imperial, Royalist, Red Flag or White, Not one of them leads La Belle France to the light. Wisdom, truth and plain-speaking? Ah, where are they found? As scarce in these days as is genuine freedom! They all prate of Honour, yet Honour all round They'll sell for the first mess of pottage from Edom. Well, Madame, _Punch_ wishes you luck with your lantern, And up, soon or late, may a true Honest Man turn! * * * * * STANZAS TO RHUBARB. (_By The O'Greedy._) O bright new-comer, I have seen, I see thee, and rejoice; Though what the coster-man may mean I judge not, by his voice. I see thee, and to either eye The tears unbidden start; O rhubarb! shall I call thee pie, Or art thou truly tart? I was not wont thy charms to see When childhood stubborn stood Fix'd in the faith, that thou must be Too wholesome to be good. Just as we loved the cloying jam, By no effects dismay'd, Regarding as a bitter sham The honest marmalade. When daffodillies deck the shops, And hyacinths indoors Recall the flavour of the drops We used to suck by scores (Pear-drops they were,--a subtle blend Of hyacinthine smell, And the banana's blackest end,-- We loved them, and were well); When chrysalis-buds are folded thick, And crocuses awake, And, like celestial almonds, stick In Flora's tipsy-cake; Before the crews are on the Thames, The swallows on the wing, The radiant rhubarb-bundle flames, The lictor-rod of Spring.