Mrs. GAMP looked at her with amazement, incredulity, and indignation. "Wot!" she with difficulty ejaculated. "A--tempest--in--a--Teapot!! And does BETSEY PRIG, my pardner for so many years, call her friend a Teapot, and decline to take up SAIREY'S righteous quarrel with a Mrs. HARRIS?" Then Mrs. PRIG, smiling more scornfully, and folding her arms still tighter, uttered these memorable and tremendous words,-- "Wy, certainly she does, SAIREY GAMP; _most_ certainly she does. Wich I don't believe there's either rhyme or reason in sech an absurd quarrel!" After the utterance of which expressions she leaned forward, and snapped her fingers, and then rose to put on her bonnet, as one who felt that there was now a gulf between them which nothing could ever bridge across. * * * * * THE PATIENT AT PLAY. _Adviser._ Have you ever been present at a performance of _The Dead Heart_? _Patient._ No; and I know nothing of a _Tale of Two Cities_. _A._ Then surely you are well acquainted with _All for Her_? _P._ I regret to reply in the negative. _A._ Perhaps, you have seen the vision in _The Bells_, or the _Corsican Brothers_? _P._ Alas! I am forced to confess I am familiar with neither! _A._ Dear me! This is very sad! Strange! I will give you a prescription. Go to _Paul Kauvar_. You will then be provided with a thoroughly enjoyable mixture. [_Exit Patient to Drury Lane, where he passes a delightful evening._ * * * * * NELLIE AT THE SODGERIES. (_Another Legend of the Royal Military Exhibition._) [Illustration] THE Lady once more left her frame in the Club Morning Room. "So I was wrong," she murmured, as she wended her way towards the now familiar spot. "Poor NELLIE, after all, was _not_ forgotten. I am glad of it,--very glad indeed!" And the flesh tints of Sir PETER LELY'S paint-brush brightened, as a smile played across the canvas features. "I' faith! the Military gentlemen are gallants, one and all! To be sure! Then how would it be possible that the foundress of a hospital should be overlooked? And one as comely as myself!" So, well pleased, she journeyed on. As she reached the river, there was quite a crowd,--people were coming by rail, and boat, and omnibus. It was quite like the olden days of the Exhibitions at South Kensington. She passed through the turnstiles, and then found the cause of the excitement. There were all sorts of good things. A gallery full of pictures, and relics of battles ancient and modern, a museum of industrial work, a collection of everything interesting to a soldier. In the grounds were balloons, and fireworks, assaults at arms, and the best military bands. At length the Lady from the frame in the Club Morning Room stood before a portrait showing a good-natured face and a comely presence.